Aunty Doreen's Sewing Circle

Hello there,

Tomorrow I will be receiving my ogre army and this is the story behind my ogres:

They want to be liked by everyone so they think the way to do it is is to be dressed in lovely fluffy clothes with happy smiley banners ,but they don't really understand the way to be liked is to stop killing everyone (as you probably know they are not exactly the brightest of creatures) so off they go into war looking rather goofy and still being hated by everyone.

I (well my dad) has created a scraplancher - with a twist. Its more like a cannon with any old bits and bobs the gnoblars can find lying around - including the arm of a dead elf. Originally it was on wheels but it was too large for the base, so we made a few modifications to it. Here a few pictures of my scraplauncher ( i hope _i'm new to this):







It is just waiting for the crew to go on the wooden and metal platforms- one to fire, one to steer.



My army is called Aunty Doreen's Sewing Circle and will include a shrek bull, various female ogres and a butcher with a pool of insides and other yuk.

I should end up with;

Scraplauncher

5 bulls

4 leadbelchers

4 ironhuts

1 bruiser (made from a bull)

20-24 Gnoblar fighters

Maybe some gnoblar trappers if there are enough left over

1 Butcher


candycake

I'm no longer alone in my weirdness!!  YAY!!

Aunty Doreen rocks! 

Like the scraplaucher, looking forward to more pictures when they are done.

HAHAHA! Lovely fluffwise
I'm a fan of these freaky ideas myself ^^
As for the scraplauncher it's original and looking good

Would like some painted Ogres or something (A)



Oh, btw...Welcome to the world of Ogres!
///oNe

Its definately unique and quirky. I can`t wait to see the ogres.

Nice scrappy so far!  Look forward to the weird and wonderful fatties to come.

And ... you interested in a quick army list?  Here's a 1000 pointer that isn't half bad and uses most of the stuff on your list:

Bruiser - great weapon, heavy armor, wyrdstone necklace = 162
Butcher = 130

5 Bulls - 2 hand weapons, standard, bellower = 225
3 Ironguts - bellower = 154
22 Gnoblar Fighers = 44

Scraplauncher = 165
2 Leadbelchers - bellower = 120
------
1000 points

Gets those ogres on the table and making friends

- Salvage

Great start of a gnoblog.
And yes, Wildcard isn't that unique anymore now

So you're having female ogres AND Shrek.
Wonder what Fiona thinks of that

Great start of a gnoblog.
And yes, Wildcard isn't that unique anymore now

was I ever???

Every one is unique but one is more unique then the other.

I love the Scraplauncher.
This machine can realy shoot?

make hippie ogres! FLOWER POWER!

My bull converted to bruiser is here;

http://i300.photobucket.com/albums/nn8/CandyCake3/P4070005.jpg You can't really see the upside down elf head with the staff shoved through it very clearly but it is nice and yucky! This model is "ungirlified" as my dad whimped out and said that it was hard enough as it was (boo  !!). Shrek ogre is 3/4 modeled and the first girly ogre is almost finished except painting. I am keeping them apart lexy, don't worry.

Thanks for the list, Boss I will try it out against my brothers high elves as soon as I have enough models.

candycake

That's two REALLY BIG horns at his back! Are they from the mûmakil?

The model looks great. My only concern though is the arm joint. The place where you place the arms following GW:s instructions. Looks a bit wierd without it being filled but that might just be me/my first reaction from that angle.


Looking good so far!
oNe



P.s. What army does your brother play? And best of luck whooping his @ss

Hi

My brother plays High Elves. He should be quite easy to beat. His motto is ;

"Jambodini's High Elves, Strike first die first."     

YAAY! My Ogre Kingdoms army book is through!!!

Thanks for all the support,

candycake 

Hi oNe

The arm is a real pain as the fixing points between a bull and butcher are so different and to be honest I had not noticed the point you have made. I am on it with the GS now!

CC's dad

Cheers oNe

Offending joint now GS'd and it looks much better. I think that I had had so much trouble getting the butcher arm to fit, GSing the back and counterbalancing the whole thing so that it didn't topple that I overlooked that rather obvious joint. I'm glad CC posted the pick now

K

Shrek goes to war.

Dad apologises for his painting which he says is not very good. I like the way shrek has ripped off his sleeves in rage.

Still needs basing and varnishing






candycake

apologies accepted
No it's not bad, though there are some simple improvements that might help.

You can use the image tag to show the pictures directly in the post.
just click on the second coloured icon (the one that looks like a picture or photo)
and put the link in between the to tags.
Just some tip to help us lazy ogres to look at your pictures

BTW the ears look great

All Bulls are finished and the regiment is called Fluffibunikin's Field of Friends. The standard beared is called Nanny Nina.

Here is a picture of Nanny Nina





What are your opinions


candycake     


Lexy, thanks for the photo tips. Any other tips on painting greatfully received. Shrek was deliberately "cartoony" but if that needs explaining then perhaps it doesn't work!

Cheers

K

(CC's dad)

Oh boy isn't that a cute little bu... euuuhhhmm Ogre

I love it, the theme is amazing and you dad deserves a cookie for painting this stuff...

the banner looks great.
two small remarks:
1. I think it looks better if you paint the bunny's head too, so it stays all painted.

2. is it the pictures, because I don't see many highlightson the pink and yellow.
A little highlight would help a bit( mix a bit of white throuh the base colour and put that on the raised area's)

Lexy,

There is highlights on the banner- I think its just the picture. Good point on the bunny head

Candycake

In that case: keep the highlights like that.
In pictures most highlights drop a little.

May I say, that the 'girly' feel of the army isn't as overwhelming as I thought it would be.
My compliments.

Hi,

Thanks for comments Lexy. You might recall at http://ogrestronghold.com/forum/index.php?topic=8454.0 I discussed my worry that if the theme was overdone it might loose longevity so I was trying to balance a fun theme against long term playability, hence not overdoing the theme too much. I am not sure whether your post approves or disapproves of the balance as struck (and perhaps I should not ask :-) ) Also CC is keen to get playing so long drawn out conversions are difficult as they are obviously time consuming. We might need to get some more bulls, for example, just to convert while she games with what she has.

K

Aaaaah, bunny...
Really nice work there, though at the same time, it's rather disturbing

Ghworg

Hello

All of my army is assembled now and another paint job is done. Here are pictures of another one of my female ogres.







It reminds me of Minnie Mouse. Who thinks I should paint white spots on the dress?

Any comments are welcomed,

candycake

Great, now it isn't even cute anymore.
Now it's just plain scary.
All those soldiers see their wives after they came out of the cafe coming at them on the battlefield

It looks great and I wouldn't do the white spots.
Now that would be too much.

The shoes are great, actually very great

Omg that blokess is scary! She should so cause terror!

Ghworg

High heels, ha!

Dig the new stuff, and I think Shrek's paintjob is spot on.  On the pink on the banner / pants, it looks a bit thin, like it could use more coats of pink to get it real solid.  Did you paint the pink right on black?  I think putting down some grey first (codex grey) or some foundation color over the black, then painting on a few coats of pink, would give a more even pink coverage.

Or it could be the pic and I'm seeing things

- Salvage

There are no words to describe this blog.
Like I said in the other thread, I like the fact that this is a father-daughter project; I like the fact that you're trying to have a girly-fied theme; and the models themselves are all very nice.

Shrek is really awsome and the lady ogress is wonderful (come on!! you gave her stilettos: now that is finesse!! ;-) ).

My only criticism is to give more layers to the colors (it might be the pics, though), but the skin and the reds (red is a hell of a color, and takes a lot of practice to master) look dirty, which can be avoided by giving more washed out layers of color (especially bright colors).

How are the bases going to be?
I think something funky would give the theme a kick ahead, instead of the usual grass-gravel.

keep it up.

cheers

Thanks for all the kind comments.

Ikim, this is actually almost a whole family project as my son (who plays HE) contributed his pocket money to the purchase, various bits from his HE army in construction and plenty of creative input too.

I think the skin colour is probably a photographic issue but it is right to say that I am having coverage problems. The banner and britches have all been undercoated with 2 + coats of watered down skull white before 2 + coats of pinks but I just can't get good cover. Since these are just core units I have not bust a gut over it but any tips for the butcher and bruiser (that I would like to be more impressive) would be appreciated. As for the red......Grrrr....lord knows how many coats in that and it still looks muddy. Perhaps I should have undercoated in white first but when I did that on my son's cavalry I ended up with a very streaky/blotchy finish.

Hmmm got me thinking about basing now.... any suggestions? Indian Takeaway carpet (will only mean something to UK readers)? Linoleum!

K

(CC's dad)

When I give a black base color, and want to paint bright colors, I usually give a couple of coats of the nearest Foundation color.
Foundation paints have more pigments, and therefor are richer in color, so will have more coverege properties.

For what concerns the bases, what is the army background?
I usually start from there, to decide what type of base I want to give my minis.
For exemple:
-my ogres are modeled to be fighting an empire regiment, so the usual grass+gravel worked for me;
-my Tyranids (now sold) were based around the theme that they have landed on a city, and destroyed all of it, so were based on broken streets;
-my eldars have a background of a destroyed craftworld, so I am basing them with temple ruins;
-the romanogres are based on the old roman roads.

Linoleum, IMO, would be too flat; indian takeaway carpet: dunno what this is.
How about some sort of kitchen floor, or a tile floor of some sort. If you look on ebay, you'll find lots of resin bases for a small ammount of money.

hope I gave you some good tips.

cheers

You have some awesome conversions and a great looking army.  When you finish them all I'm looking forward to a group shot of the entire army.

If you want VERY bright red you can do black spray prime, then codex grey, then bleached bone, then red gore or blood red and whatever highlights you want from there.  Better on small patches because of the layers involved but makes for some "not muddy" red.

I have a feeling foundation paints do a lot of that now, but have no experience with the stuff.

- Salvage

Here are the final 2 members of the Fluffibunnikins field of friends and a pic of all the guys together



Sorry they are a bit dark.

Hello there,

I have one word to say: MASSACRE

Today I played my first battle against my brother (650 point battle)and lets just say it was NOT his best battle, but it didn't make things better for him when his mage rolled not one, but TWO miscasts.

Just imagine this: High elves fleeing because of a panic test, rally , to find  my bulls one inch away from his swordmasters and my ironguts right behind them. Both bull charge; swordmaster splattered everywhere.

At the end of the game my brother had 1 unit of Pheonix guard left on the table and I had lost 1 unit of two Leadbelchers.

I won by about 750 points (allowing for table quarters generals, etc)

All my brother wants to say is: What battle? I never played candycake's ogres, I never even knew candycake had ogres!

I have to admit I had some tactical help from my dad though.

more pictures coming soon,

candycake

Long time since I've been at the forum (got a lot of stuff going on atm). Would just like to say that the army's coming around pretty good

Considering the arm joint: Didn't know for sure if it was the picture or if you'd missed but nevermind. CC are what we fellow ogres are here for

Shrek: Was thinking about the same thing as Ikim pointed out. The skin colour looks a bit flat. Some more layers of highlights/washes would really do the trick. (Might just be the photos though, having problem getting good ones myself). And as for the weathered/rusty armour look at him. Just lovely!


Nice with the whole family getting involved in a project like this, really enhances (pardon my english, I'm swedish for crying out loud! ).



Looking forward for more updates
oNe



P.s Congratulations at the massacre

D.s

_oNe_

There is no need to pardon your English. Its great - its also a lot better than my Swedish.

CC

Shrek and the ogre the big frying pan with eggs are just hilarious 
Nice conversionwork, Candycake!


BigD

About bases:
I suggest to go to a train model shop.
They usually have alot of cardboard terrain you can use as base (like my Khorne army) but also alot of terrain like static grass in different colours and stuff.

I have one word to say: MASSACRE

...
to find  my bulls one inch away from his swordmasters and my ironguts right behind them. Both bull charge; swordmaster splattered everywhere.

Congrats on the massacre!  Take that pointy ears, hurr!

Now one thing to remember, you only get the bull charge impact hits - so important against high elves and their ASF - if you charge over 6" into combat.  If your ogres were only 1" from the swordmasters you wouldn't get the extra bull charge attaks, and would have to let the swordmasters carve into you before breaking their faces.

Otherwise ... well smashed!

- Salvage

Ooooh, thanks Boss. If you dont tell him, neither will I. He had lost by then anyway!

Here are some pics of my Iron Guts "Squirrel Nutkin's Knitting Club"

First the guys all together;



Then the standard bearer with the standard shoved through his trousers





Here is the Champ (squirrel nutkin) with his marshmallow trousers and pink feathers;





Here is the most important member of the troop The Keeper of The Sacred Knitting





Leadbelchers next. Dad is thinking about sidesaddle girl rhinox rider.

Now you're beginning to worry even me! good work!

I'd like to have a smiley that is rolling over the floor in a uncontrolable laugh.
I'm glad I didn't have tea in my mouth, because my laptop would be waisted.
Great work and great combination.

I'm curious though: how did you (dad) do the wool on the back?

So, here are my leadbelchers;

First here is Stacey's WeightWatchers;



Here is the Thnderfist; Stacey Tracey Looking scary;



Here he is from behind trying to be cute. It's a bit dark so I'm not sure if you can see the pink love heart tattoos on his arms;



Here is Stacey's friend Dorris;



..and the rest of the weightwatchers.



 Dad wondered what would happen if you put a cannon against one of my brothers high elves chests and fired it so that is what he painted. Yuerk.

Butcher is underway now, any tips for girlifying the painting? We thought about "Kiss The Chef" on the apron.

Dad wondered what would happen if you put a cannon against one of my brothers high elves chests and fired it so that is what he painted. Yuerk.

Your dad = awesome

More great stuff, love the heartbreaker thunderfist.  The Knitting Keeper is excellent as well.

- Salvage

They look great.
The pink heart is funny the same as the heart on his behind.

Butcher is underway now, any tips for girlifying the painting? We thought about "Kiss The Chef" on the apron.

"Feed the chef"  might be better.

Now this Gnoblog is something that brightens my day everytime I click on the link.

Your dad should be awarded, really...
Keep up the awesome work there Dad, you bring some color into Wargamming
:rofl: (sorry I tried Lexy)

Hi folks

Today we had a little incident with the Miffy Standard. It was lying in the middle of the floor, broken at the pole of the standard. We thought  it could never be saved, but thankfully dad rescued it before he gave up on trying to fix it.

BTW
The butcher is finished and here are a few pics of it:





It was so generically disgusting we were finding it hard to girlify, but of course  we found a way

hope you like it

candycake

I love to be in a decision making moment with you.

"It has blood and all the gory things"
'Check'
"Now, let's girlify it"
'Mmmm, we need flowers, and a sweet text on the apron'
"And pink of course"

It looks great again.

My new IGs will be arriving on Sunday and some will be made into my Rhinox riders including Gloria Ironskin (wife of Ghark Ironskin) Her mechanical rhinox is almost finished and I will post some pics soon. Meanwhile here is Gloria's story as written by my Dad and brother;


...



The Lay of Gloria Ironskin


Gather Ye round now and listen well for the tale I tell is true. Cast aside the twittering of other fools and the prattling of those as was not there and mark well as I reveal The Lay of Gloria Ironskin….



“It’s just not fair, Ghark,” Gloria grumbled, picking her teeth with a discarded gnoblar bone, “You and your cronies march all over the land pillaging and goodness knows what else and I end up cooped up here all day. It’s just not right.”

“Sorry dear, it’s just business… boring stuff; trampling and shouting, shouting and trampling … you know ...just...work!” mumbled Ghark without looking up from his game of draft (1).

“Well, it’s just not good enough. Why can’t I come? Other husbands take their wives on business trips.”

“Not Ogres. Not our business. Not our trips.” grunted Ghark absent mindedly shoving his drafts piece into his opponents eye to the appreciative applause of his courtiers, “Besides you really couldn’t keep up old thing”

“Really, I’m sure I could ride a Rhinox as well as the next ogre if you just let me try, besides you didn’t do such a good job with old Bladehorn last time I checked on him. Dirty great spear through him I seem to recall.”

“Now, dear, you know how upset I am about that. Please don’t mention it again. Look how tense it makes me.” He complained irritably wiping the remains of a crushed gnoblar from between his fingers, “Oh, dear, now look what you made me do, that was one of my best Sword-gnoblars too. Anyway that terribly nice Mr SteelKastersensensen from the Chaos Dwarves has made me a nice new shiny one from magic, metal and….and…stuff.”

Gloria couldn’t help but feel (2) that although Ghark seemed pleased with his new Rhinox it just wasn’t the same for him somehow. Ghark had loved his big fat heaving mass of hairy flatulent flesh despite the smell. Gloria suspected he had been quite fond of Bladehorn too. So, slowly, as is almost always the way with ogres she began to form an idea. By 2 am as the Gnoblar attendants wiped away yet another mass of drool from her open mouth the thought emerged and Gloria put her plan in action.


………………………………………………………………………………………………


“So, Mrs Ironskin, how may we assist you today?” asked Graaak SteelKastersensensen peering up what he believed to be the north face of mount Gloria.

“I need a Rhinox repairing”

“Ah, yes, now, here we have a problem, you see, Rhinox are what we dwarves call “animals” so if they break they really are quite difficult to fix you know.”

“I have brought shiny stuff” said Gloria hefting a huge sack from her shoulder, upending it and allowing its contents to cascade to the floor. As the last gold coin settled at the top of the heap that now buried Graaak to his shoulders Gloria smiled; “Does that help”

“ It does offer some assistance madam, yes. Now this rhinox. Would it be the animal that you brought with you?” smiled Gaaark tearing his eyes away from the heap of jewels, gold and trinkets that threatened to suffocate him. :

“Yes, ‘twas my husbands fabled mount, Bladehorn.”

“And had Bladehorn been..erm..deceased for some time before you left home?”

“ About …….” Gloria’s face twisted into even more unpleasant contortions as she realised that she could not count, “lots of days…then some more days.” She smiled, happy that she had finally nailed the whole numeracy thing there.

“Hmm, lots of days and some more days, yes, that might explain it yes, and was it a long journey my dear lady?”

“Oh yes..erm…some days…and some more days” replied Gloria, feeling that she had finally hit her stride.

“Yes, you see, and I do not wish to appear negative by this observation, there isn’t actually very much of dear old Bladehorn left.”

Gloria looked bashful; “Long journey, got peckish” she mumbled.

“Yes, in fact, all there is, really, is just a backbone and a few ribs”

“’es” whispered Gloria.

“Which makes “repairing” quite a challenge really” Gaaark smiled as kindly as he could.

“ I brought shiny stuff.” Gloria smiled, feeling back on safe ground with the dwarf on the subject of gold.

“Yes, yes,” Nodded Gaaark with all the eagerness of a dwarf who sees the possibility of a heap of riches reaching to his ears being snatched away by the clammy hands of fate (and an ogre) unless he moves, and thinks, fast. “How about if we salvage what we can and build some nice moving parts to see if we can get it up and about again, eh? That’s the ticket, yes.”
………………………………………………………………………………………………

“You did WHAT!!??” Bellowed Ghark Ironskin, causing several small avalanches in some of the more remote passes of the Mourn Mountains.

“I brought Bladehorn back. I thought you might ride him then I could have your metal one, so I could come on your business trips with you.” Muttered Gloria with the feeling that her plan might have been better thought through.

“Are you insane, woman!? Bladehorn is DEAD! That….that… THING,” he boomed, gesturing at the huge contraption of bone, iron, clockwork and steam that stood sweating and vibrating in the cavemouth, “Is NOT Bladehorn. You DUG UP my faithful and brave Bladehorn and turned it into THAT, just so you could come out with me and the chaps on our trips?! No, No I forbid it. I am putting my foot down NOW!”

“Ghark Derek Ironskin, how dare you FORBID me anything. I am a beautiful special individual. While I was away with the Chaos Dwarves I learned a few things about the outside world. It’s not all bellow, shout, stomp and bellow again you know” She shouted to gasps of horror and shouts of disbelief, “I’ve seen things like you can’t imagine. I seen knitting patterns, and ‘ickle rabbits, and kittens and handbags and… and… I’ve seen AUNTY DOREEN’S SEWING CIRCLE and if you can’t accept me for who I am then they will. Goodbye, Gark Ironskin. I hope your mechanical rhinox will keep you and the chaps happy. I know Aunty Doreen will love mine”

And so it was that Gloria Ironskin Mounted her faithful steam Rhinox, Pooh, and rode off to meet her destiny with Aunty Doreen’s Sewing Circle. Ghark,  riven with sorro,w barely spoke again and, though he cunningly wove a story around his silence, those of us who were there know that the clanking of Gloria’s Rhinox drowned the sound of an Ogre’s heart breaking.





(1)   A game rather like drafts but adapted for ogre intelligence levels by giving each sided only 1 piece. Since the game is generally only played by Tyrants, no-one knows the rules but by general consensus the boss always wins.

(2)   A relatively difficult concept for an ogre.

Candycake

So here is Gloria's steam Rhinox. You cannot see the machinery inside the ribs very well. We are looking for some girlie suitcases, brushes, mirrors etc to hang from the rhinox

WOW!!!!
Now you have to tell us what pieces you used for this AWSOME creation!!!!
This is really impressive.


cheers

*Nods with mouth fallen open

It looks very good and the story is great too.

WOW is right, nice rhinox!

I smell Bionicle for some of the parts, but curious too!

- Salvage

Thanks for the comments

The MecRhinox is actually a bit too big. It is about 1" longer than the rhinox on our scraplaucher and so is bigger than a bull rhinox and so chariot base. This means that I need to think of some cunning way to base it (Ideas PLEASE) and some way to bulk out CCs iron gut so that it doesn't look totally silly when mounted. I am currently thinking of some kind of palaquin/throne. Ideas again please!

K

CC's dad.

If it's a bit too long then I guess you could just get some plasticard and cut it to thew appropriate length. Then get the longest base GW makes, stick it to the plasticard and use smaller bases to fill in the rest of the space on the plasticard. Fill the gaps with your favourite putty and voila.

Hello people of the ogre stronghold forum,

My bruiser is now finished and here are a few pics of him girlified and painted

Here is a front shot



Close up of girlified gutplate and impailed helf head (thanks to my brother, jambodini!)



Close up of the Girlie-mace




hope you all like him.

The idea of having snow and grass on the base is because Aunty Doreen's ogres have emerged from the depths of the high mountains, to come further down where it is still a little snowy , but the spring has sprung and the grass is green and full of ickle flowers

Still looking for help with the mecRhinox base,

candycake

Wow. Even with the girlification that is one nasty looking tyrant. I think it actually makes him look even more fearsome with the pink and flower symbols and stuff. He's kind of like, "I wear flowers, and I like it. What are you going to do about it."

Edit: As for the basing problem, is there any scope for readjustment of the leg positions? Or are they completely fixed as they are now? If they can be readjusted, you could have its front legs standing on an overturned cart or something, making it both more imposing, and putting its length at an angle, meaning it will be easier to fir within the base. I don't know whether 1" might be too much length for this to fix though.

Hi everyone

We have done quite a lot since my last post. We have made a base for Gloria's rhinox by sticking her on a landslide (Thanks for your suggestion anyway Willy Wobbleguts and assimiliation) we have made another rhinox out of a toy and greenstuff, we have converted one of my new IGs into a rider and we are making Gloria now.

Does anyone want work in progress pics?

candycake

Does anyone want work in progress pics?

Silly question really!!! Yes please!!!!

JJ

OK

Here is Gloria;




She will be riding side saddle with a long skirt rather like this;




so we are not paying too much care to her legs! She will have a two handed sword converted to one hand. I like the bunches blowing in the wind.

I have just noticed the hand positions on those two pics and now I'm thinking "hmmm.... parasol?" What do you think?



Here is another rhinox rider just awaiting gutplate and reins to complete;



The photo does not show the barrels and stuff buried in the fur very well but I will post more when they are all finished

Yeah, I think a parasol would add another light-hearted touch And would really fit with your feminine theme

I love Gloria She is hot, by Ogre standards anyway

JJ

I love Gloria  She is hot, by Ogre standards anyway

Err, Josh, you do know gloria isn't the one in white don't you- she is the one with no legs, only one hand and a full face helmet. If that is hot you must find it really hard to get girlfriends

K

(CC's dad)

I know which one And, yeah, as I said

by Ogre standards anyway

... This kinda implies that I meant she is hot as far as ogres go And it was meant as a joke. In all seriousness, the model looks good

really hard to get girlfriends

Erm, no, not really. I have been with my girlfriend 7 months now mate lol

JJ

'twas but a fanciful jest, Mon ami. No offense intended.

K

Jest taken in the wrongful manner Twas thought of as a slight upon my character lol! Sorry mon ami

Once again though, I always think it's good to see female ogres being converted So, good job

JJ

love the work the female ogre with frying pan is great, cant wait to see the finished rider on steamrhinox, give her a parasol just to add that extra touch,
       anton

Hi people in the ogre stronghold

I had my first proper match last Sunday. I played in a pair with my brother, (Jambodini's helves) against Chaos Daemons and VCs. It was a draw (...in our favour ) only 10pts away from minor victory.

I have got a scratch built hunter (thanks to my dad) and two black kitten toys as sabertusks. Pics will follow soon.

Gloria is coming along nicely although dad said the parasol would be too hard.

Thanks for the comments

candycake

The steam Rhinox is very impressive.
wow.

I love the style of your army.
Flowers and blood   

Get one of those little drink umbrellas and use that. After all, Ogres wouldn't make pretty parasols.

You can also use a cap of something (like deodorant bottles (the sprays))
There must be something that will already be a parasol?

I was thinking about the top of a bicycle bell, but that might be too heavy.

Thanks assimilation- I looked at the drinks 'brollies but they all seem to be made from wood and crepe paper and so would not survive on the table top for very long even with plenty of PVA to strengthen.

Lexy, if you see anything let me know- I will leave that hand free for the time being so if you see something suitable post a pic/details and I will see what I can fudge up.

Thanks for the suggestions, keep 'em coming. My GS skills are certainly not up to sculpting a parasol from nothing.

Cheers
 
K

(CC's dad)

Candycake,

I am sorry to say, but your dad is a liar.

In my gnoblog he says that he does not know how to paint, and some searching brings me to this thread.

Great looking army, original theme and great execution.

Thanks warhammerlord_soth

"The praise of the praiseworthy is above all rewards."

K

Hi guys,

My hunter is ready and here a a few pics of it.

Can I have suggestions for a name for him please, I'm all out of ideas?!





notice the sweet little kittens....


They are FEAR causing those vicious kittens you know!!!

Gloria is almost finished and we hope to post pics of her tomorrow.

candycake

INCOMING SNOWBALL!!

Fantastic conversions and interesting paintscheme, love 'em

What can I say ? They're gorgeous !

ITS MY BIRTHDAY TODAY!!! Dad has to register for the forum for me so you've probably got his birthday down. NM.

This morning I got a much needed pack of IGs and some bulls that will be converted into Skrag/butcher and two TOP SECRET MEs. All will be revealed shortly, so keeeeeeep watching!

candycake

Happy birthday Candycake !

Happy Birthday Candycake

happy birthday candycake!

Happy birthday to the Stronghold's girliest member

So how many years of pain... I mean happiness have you given your family now?

Hiding,
K (Evii)

Thank you, thank you.

That will be 11 years of unalloyed joy, crying, and other general lovely stuff.

candycke

Thats 11 chronological years. About 30 in cynicism !

Also pat on the back for CC who has just heard today that she has won a scholarship to her secondary school, so double celebration at this end!!

K

(CCs proud dad)

Double congratulations for you CC.
And that means more money for warhammer I guess?

Today Jambodini and I teamed up and played dad and another guy (lets call him MR X) at our club playing dwarves. Dad played Chaos dwarves and Jambodini took him on whilst I went and played Mr X. After Dad's centaurs were taken out the centaur hero-ey guy took out jambodini's archers in one turn containing BOTH OF HIS MAGES!!! After that it all went downhill. Jambodini refused to charge his DPs into a unit of hobgobbos fearing their CR and well... you can guess how the game went on.

On my side of the board It all went spiffingly. All of Mr X's CC units - killed - bolt thrower 1 - killed.
I came charging up the table to run into all of his CC units. Unfortunately my bulls were killed by warriers, causing an overrun into my butcher only to then be flanked by my unit of IGs (yes we won this!), but my other unit of IGs survived. The unit that was being fought by my IGs (a second unit of warriers) was then flanked by my unit of BSB, bruiser and ME. My unit of IGs in that block were then flanked by a DS and then rear charged by a unit of miners. After all the confusion of who went after who and how many wounds were caused and all that malarkie we won. HOORAY! That then caused my ME unit to charge into Mr x's bolt launcher which was wiped out instantaneously.

So to sum up: Jambodini was completely creamed
              I got into a very confusing battle and won
              It was a MV to Mr X and dad unfortunately
              I just made you extremely confused

candycake

Well, good job candycake.
Jambodini playin Helfs?

Unlucky on the battle, but sounds like you learnt from it a lot! Aunt Doreen and her pals are playing better and better every game...

BB

Yes Jambodini was playing Helves - sorry forgot to mention that. Typical -join up with Helves and they let you down

Hopefully I'll win the next game...

candycake

Yes Jambodini was playing Helves - sorry forgot to mention that. Typical -join up with Helves and they let you down

Hopefully I'll win the next game...

candycake

And that's why I hate the pansies: Think you might eat them if they win, so they commit suicide They ain't as smart as they think they are... We can always eat the dead bodies

-Evii

Yeah but everybody knows they taste better alive, and shame about that candycak, but at least you learnt something.

And that's why I hate the pansies: Think you might eat them if they win, so they commit suicide They ain't as smart as they think they are... We can always eat the dead bodies

-Evii

Lovely! I was considering putting this on my sig!

candycake, congratulations on one of the most imaginative armies ever!  I love it - every model has something wonderful to feast the eyes upon.  Your whole family should be very proud of yourselves! Doreen is divine, and Barbie, IMHO, is a masterpiece (or should that be a mistresspiece )  I can't wait for the next installment...

Thanks so much for the kind words beastmum especially given the quality of the models you have done.

Next I will be posting:
another ME
more IGs
and the fluff for Doreen, Geoffrey and the gorgers.

candycake

Loads to update from my birthday prezzies!

First some new IG's; Flora's Fatties




Then my new bruiser with brace who dad tells me has to be called Grubby Harold (He says its a film - probably a silent movie!)






He is also Aunty Doreen's new standard bearer (dad only realised after he made him that BSB can't have brace - D'oh)

Here he is with The Helfwacker;



He will be so sad when he realises what he's done to that poor bunny-wabbit.

Lastly my newest Maneater Gritswit Gnoblswinger. Guess where he has been working!



Some fluff will follow soon for Harold and Gritswit especially about how he and Thunor get along. Jambodini is running badly behind on his fluff duties so I am going to hold his armycase to ransom!

Gritswit Gnoblswinger made my jaw drop and snap in 2.. THAT IS THE MOST AWESOME MODEL I HAVE SEEN! o.0 i would totally buy it! (got to get more money or make my own ) what models and parts did you use for that model?

Gritswit Gnoblswinger made my jaw drop and snap in 2.. THAT IS THE MOST AWESOME MODEL I HAVE SEEN! o.0 i would totally buy it! (got to get more money or make my own ) what models and parts did you use for that model?

We used
1) A gnoblar - obviously
2) A bull
3) Some chain from the Brettonnian men-at-arms set
4) The moon from one of the scenery bits from BFSP
5) Lots and lots of green stuff.



candycake

Gritswit Gnoblswinger made my jaw drop and snap in 2.. THAT IS THE MOST AWESOME MODEL I HAVE SEEN! o.0 i would totally buy it! (got to get more money or make my own ) what models and parts did you use for that model?

We used
1) A gnoblar - obviously
2) A bull
3) Some chain from the Brettonnian men-at-arms set
4) The moon from one of the scenery bits from BFSP
5) Lots and lots of green stuff.

candycake

1) got loads of em
2) can break one
3) got chaos chains
4) dont have
5) have but dont know how to use it (tried to use it once and ruined the whole model..) :talking about the killakan..

EDIT:
mind if i try something similar?

Love the Night Goblin Maneater... Fanatic Gnoblars FTW~!

-Evii

Knock yourself out Leet. BTW the bull isn't broken just a greenstuffed robe. I can offer some tips if required but you can probably do just as well without tips from me!

K

Quote from: candycake on March 07, 2009, 03:47:37 PM
That flaming sword of yours is now just 78% nitrogen, 21% oxygen and 1% carbon dioxide, argon and other gases.

YAY! I've been siged!

nah i ment that im slicing my bull to pieces and adding new arms and gutplates

Quote from: candycake on March 07, 2009, 03:47:37 PM
That flaming sword of yours is now just 78% nitrogen, 21% oxygen and 1% carbon dioxide, argon and other gases.

YAY! I've been siged!

happy to see you thrilled

i could use some greenstuff tips

Nice models. I like the way the metal turned out on the ironguts, and the battle standard is pretty awesome.
The maneater's robes are really shiny, has it been sprayed with gloss varnish? or inked? It looks pretty cool though (Andre the Giant in a doomsday cloak, anyone?).

Thanks Reg,

It's gloss varnish but we will probably dullcoat it later.I tend to use gloss to give protection against chips then dullcoat on RnF models but leave characters etc gloss so they stand out more. I actually quite like gloss varnish although I know I'm in the minority there!

I tried some new techniques on these IGs as I wanted them to look grubbier and less fluffy (though they all have flower tattoos on their shoulders lest you think we have sold out). One of the things I wanted to try was working on rust so I experimented with some powder coatings before the undercoat. GWs snow and baking soda both produced a very nice super-rusty effect when painted-like that really deep corrosion that happens when thick steel is left exposed for years and begins to come away in big flakes rather than just surface pitting. I'm glad you think it worked - I was pretty pleased with it myself

Thanks for the comments on the Helf whacker- It first appeared back with Mavis Green who is now out of a job I guess. It was intended to celebrate CCs victories over her brother. Sadly for her he has upped his game quite a lot now and is pretty hard to beat.

BTW I think it was the holocaust cloak. A great film though my kids don't get the humour!!!

K- CCs model gimp

Then my new bruiser with brace who dad tells me has to be called Grubby Harold (He says its a film - probably a silent movie!)

I believe your dad is referring to Dirty Harry, classic Clint Eastwood cop movie.
Other than that, I love how much imagination you put into every single model, by far one of the most creative armies i've seen.

Is that and orange smiley face on the far left irongut?  If so, then you win.

The sword stuck in the other sword really cracked me up.

The High Elf must have had a very hard grip on that sword.

Yes, Kallus, it's a smilie.

@Manowar; The Helf sword is actually in the IGs head rather than his sword! I thought the helf accidentally clonked the IG on the backswing and didn't live to regret it.

K

As we are just a week from eastern legends tournament we tried our PS  (http://www.ogrestronghold.com/forum/index.php?topic=12186.0 ) list at the club today against a Welf list that was almost all forest spirits; lots of dryads, a unit of 6 treekin, 2 treemen,  and a couple of units of wardancers. Our deathstar got combo charged by 3 units including the treeman general and won! Even in a challenge against the treeman with annoyance of nettings(?) we held out and the 5+ to hit was a real bonus. On thinking about it again perhaps we should have accepted with the tenderiser bruiser as we did roll a 6 or 2 but never mind. When we won the combat we ran him down anyway.

Greedyfist was obviously no use against a treeman but it lead to an interesting conversation about whether our successful save just turned him into a tree.

A very good game though and those Welves were nasty. I might have to stop teasing them so much.......nah!


>>Edit ; Oh yes I forgot to say that we won 3;1 on the tourney scoring - a point for the gereral and 1 each on 2 units of wardancrs; one killed by the DS, one shot up by LBs. The point each on the gnobbies works a treat so far. I brought on the gorgers as far away from the battle as possible so they survived. He did for my scrappy though and I am rethinking where we put that point now.

Candycake

Congrats on the tourney result... sounds like the game was tough but a real laugh and had an EPIC combat too

Greedyfist was obviously no use against a treeman but it lead to an interesting conversation about whether our successful save just turned him into a tree.

Chuckled at that. Can actually imagine that conversation. Gratz on the tournament result too.

-Evii

Wow, the work you've done is just pure jaw-dropping!

Hi guys

Sorry if I caused some confusion my last game was the last warm up game before the tourey - thats tomorrow.

Thank you to Kozwak for the kind comments ( - anymore are welcome!)

Jambodini has FINALLY done my gorger fluff. You may need to know the tune "in the ghetto" by Elvis.



IN THE CAVERN – The straynge tayle of Gorgeous George and Gorgeous Georgina in song

Morris E., self-proclaimed master musician of the Sewing Circle, was in quite a lot of bother.
His epic song/tale about the newest additions to the tribe, the gorgers, was way overdue. He’d promised to perform the tale to Doreen and her tribe tomorrow at their annual get-together. If he didn’t, she would take his banjo and whack him over the head with it repeatedly.
He looked down at his sheet of paper. Apart from the spittle, grease and blood, it was totally blank. The absence of manuscript was not assisted by the fact that Morris was completely illiterate.
He was in serious trouble. He just couldn’t make a song with a decent tune, let alone write the lyrics for it.
“Ah, well,” muttered Morris to himself. “I’ll just make up anything. They won’t mind…”


“Laydeeeeez and gentlemeeeen!” cried the small, scrawny gnoblar on the stage, “Weeeelcome to our annual Sewing Circle get-together!”
The huge crowd of Ogres cheered in an orderly and girly fashion. At the back, two Ogres were brandishing a banner that proclaimed, “VE IZ LUVIN MURISS. I!”, proving that not only did the Ogres love the performer, but that they, like Morris, were either dyslexic or unable to write anything more complicated than, “I”.
“Now, for the first act, we have the amazing, astounding, totally brilliant Morris. E, singing his new hit single, In the Cavummmph…!”
The Ogres cheered again as the gnoblar crier was simultaneously flattened and gassed by a pair of knickers thrown on the stage by a wild spectator. Nearby, a group of gnoblar backing singers took one sniff of the air and permanently lost their sense of smell as their nervous systems suffered irreparable damage.
Morris suddenly appeared on the stage. The audience went crazy as they admired his grubby white, rhinestone-studded, tassled costume and utterly ridiculous coal-black quiff, and, most of all, his shining sunglasses.
“Uh-huh,” said Morris , for effect. The crowd went even wilder.
Morris turned to a gnoblar singer, whispered a few instructions for the song, and told him to give him a note so he could tune up his voice.
Morris sang a note.
The crowd went silent. A hint of worry flashed across their faces.
Morris sang another note, possibly a B sharp flat.
The crowd flew into a panic, and wildly searched for something to shove into their ears.
Morris’ eyes lit up.
The crowd screamed in terror.
He smiled evilly,
The crowd prepared for certain doom
He opened his mouth wide and bellowed:


(To the the tune of “in The Ghetto by Elvis)


“As the snow flies…
It was cold and gray in the Mounts’ of Mourn
Dem poor little baby whelps is born
In the caverrrrrrn… (In the caverrrrrrn…)

And his mama cries….
And she turns away with her eyes closed shut
‘Cause they’ve got abs instead of a gut
In the caverrrrrrn… (In the caverrrrrrn…)

People, don't you understand
These whelps’ guts are really bland
And their skin is pink, so they’re weird an’ they’re weak
Take a look at you and me,
are we too blind to see,
That mum’ll throw ‘em to the beasts
‘Cause, basically, they’re ugly freaks

Well the world turns….
And their dad takes ‘em out to the edge of town
To a deep dark pit and he throws them down
To the gorgers… (to the gorgers…)

And the other gorgers think,
That they’re freaky things, even for them
So they throw ‘em out
Right there and then
From the caverrrrrrn… (From the caverrrrrrn…)

Alone and cold in desperation
The young beasts break away
They build some men out of snow
In place of the mum they never got to know

And the gorgers cry….

Then a hunter and ‘tusks gathers 'round them there
Beat em up senseless and takes ‘em to her lair
With Aunty Doreeeeeen… (With Aunty Doreeeeeen…)

As the gorgers are tied….
in the cold and gray Mountains of Mourn
George and georgina have found a home
With Aunty Doreeeeeen… (With Aunty Doreeeeeen…)”


Morris finished.
The crowd was absolutely silent. You could have heard a pin drop.
He looked around. The faces of the audience were frozen in an expression of pure primal terror, the sort of terror you feel when a star dragon is staring in your face and asking if you would like to come a barbecue he’s preparing. Out in the gnoblars’ section, only one gnoblar had survived the performance by gnawing off his own leg – the rest has suffered cardiac arrests, burst eardrums and exploding heads.
He felt that a comment would stir up a bit of applause.
“Thangyouverymuch,” mumbled  Morris.
Someone out in the audience roared, “Right! Let’s get ‘im!”
Suddenly most of the audience was brandishing some sort of sharp or blunt instrument and preparing to use it against Morris. He screamed in horror as the crowd advanced on him with clubs, swords, scimitars and, in Aunty Doreen’s case, his banjo.
Morris sprinted out of the cave, the mob in hot pursuit.
The remaining one-legged gnoblar felt that something was needed to finish the performance. He limped up onto the stage, cleared his throat and squeaked to the remaining part of the audience,
“Erm… ladies and gentlemen… Morris has left the building......”

"Erm' ladies and gentlemen' Morris has left the building......"
 

That was funny, great song too.
I was hoping morris got into the army, but I can forget that now I guess

good song! hey its a great idea! making ogry songs from real ones we should start a topic at the offtopic and call it "ogre lyrics"
how did you come up with that song?

Gosh, it's been a while!

As I am now involved in animosity 5 it has quickly become apparent that Geoffrey the Spoon Gnoblar does a great deal more that just animate Doreens Wartable. He has become her diplomat and general factotum. As a result he seemed to desrve his own model so here he is struggling with all those awful letters and demands that so trouble Her Tyrantessness;



He will also be receiving some fluff for A5 which will follow!

EDIT; Ooops just realised i posted this on Js account!

K

Yay! I like the looks of Geoffrey and his spoon. Is that a pile of mail or recipes?

Well, the whole animosity campaign has fired up a bit of creativity hereabouts. Most significant is that the history of the previously enigmatic Aunty Doreen is beginning to emerge. I'm afraid that it is rather less light hearted than many of the previous offerings. If there is enough interest I will post it here too.

Any takers?

Yes please! Or perhaps we should shape it into a piece of fiction for the Bellower?

OK well, if only for Randroid here we go. If you would like it reworking or holding back for the bellower PM me and we can sort out from there Ran.

First Aunty Doreen is currently at war in Estalia as part of the Animosity 5 campaign. She has (perhaps predictably) joined The Protectorate, a faction dominated by Brets, who are trying to establish save havens and refugee camps for the benefit of the dispossessed of the war torn region. A faction Figurehead in Estalia is none other than a famous ogre; Generalissimo Grugluk Skulltaka

(http://animositycampaigns.com/joomla/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=597&Itemid=80)

So, without further ado here is the first section of....



Aunty Doreen’s Sewing Circle- The Truth and The Pain


PREFACE

Little is known of the origins of the founder of the Sewing Circle, the eponymous Aunty Doreen, what little is known is shrouded in myth and legend. It is said that she single handedly defeated the Mighty Snag the Merciless and his bloody hoard of Boyz armed only with a bunch of gladioli and a broken chair leg. Others whisper that it was she who brought about the destruction of Groth Onefinger after he unadvisedly consumed her collection of prize chrysanthemums. Still others have dared to suggest that she may indeed have been driven to madness by glimpsing the maw while on a Rhinox skiing holiday, what is certain is that at some point in her long and distinguished life Aunty Doreen chanced upon a radical theory. It was simply this;

“People don’t like ogres. People like flowers and sunshine and ‘ickle fwuffy kittens. To make people like ogres we must be fluffier.”

Unassailable logic. Doreen therefore set about building a tribe of fluffy ogres dressed in happy smiley colours with cheery banners and smiley tattoos in place of the previous, frankly rather grim, ogre themes. The flaw, of course, in Doreen’s logic is that the thing that people don’t like about ogres is that they are violent genocidal maniacs who smell like the flatulent corpse of a 3 week dead Rhinox stuffed with limburger. Those things, sadly, she omitted to address.

Perhaps owing to Doreen’s unorthodox philosophy other, more conventional, ogres have been less that forthcoming in joining her tribe with the result that she now commands a rag-tag band of ogres rejected by other tribes but accepted by Doreen despite their weirdness. As a consequence these misfits and outcasts fight all the harder for Doreen who has finally given them the acceptance they crave.

So it is that armies have quailed as the might of Doreen’s pink and fluffy hoard marched to war, kitten banners fluttering in the breeze ready to reap bloody murder on all those who dare to point and laugh…..

But now comes the day... a red day... ere the sun rises the truth will be told and that which was forgotten, remembered. Now rises the truth behind the legend. The truth and the pain of Doreen.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

CHAPTER ONE- A CALL TO ARMS


Estalia…….…Estalia….

Far down in the slow raw mind of an ogre thoughts and memories take time to emerge. Some blaze like comets across their consciousness others rise like leviathan from the depths. For Doreen this one shone with a cold and hard intensity. A diamond, it sang to her from The Dark Times. The times before her memory. The times before she was She. The times before Doreen. One solitary name in all that lost time and history. One flash of light. One link to The Past. One twinge of pain and sadness beyond her capacity to express.

Estallia.

Geoffrey the Spoon Gnoblar, factotum to The Tyrantess Aunty Doreen peered into the immobile face of his mistress with a troubled countenance. He was well accustomed to the inevitable vacant periods that meant Her Tyrannical Majesty was processing some new thought or idea but this was very different. Her faced was fixed with what, had he not known better, he would have considered intense concentration.

“Your Tyrantessness…Your Majesty…are you..er…quite well?”

A long pause.

“Estallia..?” Rumbled his mistress.

“Er…yes, Your Majesty..As I was saying, it would appear that war is brewing there. Many of your subjects are eager that we participate. You are aware that many of your faithful Guts wish to spread their wings as Mercenaries, to return to the Tribe as Maneaters. Frankly the Coffers could do with some Soldiers of Fortune revenue too.” He pressed, hoping to have pulled her from her reverie.

“I….should know…Estalia.” Doreen struggled to hold the memory, to open it to the light of her hut. A fleeting image of an Ogre Heifer laughing with a Young Bull, still too young for his gutplate, but then it twisted like a fish in a stream, slipped from her grasp and was lost.
“Estalia…yes..Perhaps, Geoffrey, perhaps…but I fear…there is something in Estalia…Something that I think I fear…I…”

Geoffrey’s usual unctuous smile began to fade. His mistress was many things; Fierce, certainly. Egalitarian, always. Insane, possibly but timorous, indecisive and afraid ?- Never.

“Mistress, the tribe will grow restless. You subjects itch for war, glory and red meat. A conflict awaits and they are eager…”

"Something...old, someone...I"

"Your Tyrantessness, your subjects.."

“Leave me, Gnoblar!” bellowed the Ogress turning her terrifying face and breath on her faithful advisor. “I must think on this.”

Geoffrey bowed low, collected his missives from the floor of the hut and began towards the door, his shadow elongated by the sun setting through the hovel’s entrance. Checking behind himself he saw his mistress again staring into space as if the weight of the Old World had settled on her ample shoulders.

"This could end in tears, mark my words, tears" he sighed as he settled in for a long vigil outside his mistresses hut.





……………………………………………………………………………………………….

This is one of the single most weird things I have ever seen. 'Nuff said.

Aunty Doreen’s Sewing Circle- The Truth and The Pain


CHAPTER TWO- AN UNEXPECTED VISITOR



Estalia…Estalia

The word echoed through The Tyrantesses foetid dreams, twisting emotions tearing her sleep into nightmares. Something was reaching to her from that dark hidden past that her mind had locked away. A sweet agony, a razorblade in honey. Images stalked through her sleep; A young strong Bull, freshly blooded, watching the Tribe’s summer games- the smell of  roasting meat, the cries of the crowd. He turns to her “One day I’ll lift the Rhinox just for you…”  and then the pain. The unendurable, unspeakable pain, her mind retreats and she is, again, Doreen.

Crying aloud Aunty Doreen lurched upright in her pallet. “Estalia” she muttered and, shivering, lay down again to try to find the peace of sleep in the hope that her dreams would show her some truth or answer to her dilemma but certain that they would only bring more confusion and hurt. This was her seventh night since the communiqués had begun to arrive. A week of unexpressable nightmares and indecision. What should the tribe do? Why did she hesitate? This was a war, there were pickings to be taken, battles to be fought and wages to be earned. Often enough she had taken her tribe to war; for right, for duty, oft-times just for the money. Why this hesitation, why this reserve, why this…fear?

Aunty Doreen rose from her bed and lumbered to the collection of colourful earthenware pots by the firplace. She sat heavily by the hearth and drank deeply from a jug of stale water. She stared at the flames as if they might hold some relief. She warmed her hands. Snow. It would snow tomorrow. She would decide with the first snowfall. She would talk to the tribe tomorrow. There was always tomorrow.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….


All movement around the camp stopped. All eyes were turned on him. The tall armoured knight raised his visor, dropped his sword and fell exhausted from the saddle of his great war horse.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

Gradually Sir Giles de Ballinot surfaced from a terrifying dream. Great rough hands had  been carrying him then removing his fine armour with clumsy fingers. Raw meat had been forced between his teeth and, with shame and gratitude he had ravenously consumed it. ..and the smell. Oh, the smell.

…The smell was still there.

Giles opened his eyes to find himself staring into the face of a strange goblin like creature clad in a grubby yellow robe who was sitting by Giles’ crude sleeping pallet on what appeared to be a pile of ledgers.

“At last. I am glad to see Your Lordship somewhat recovered.” It said in surprisingly melodious tones, “Permit me to introduce myself; I am Geoffrey, factotum to Aunty Doreen of the Sewing Circle Tribe. You, My Lord, are a very long way from home and very lucky to be alive.” The creature closed the book that was open on its lap. Put down what seemed to be a quill pen and steepled its fingers. “What say you tell me what brings you here before the tribes desire for canned meat exceeds my ability to restrain them?”

“I bring a message from his Lordship, Baluin the Exile, for The Tyrantess Aunty Doreen and am much relieved at last to have found you at last” He whispered, trying desperately not to gag at the stench in the rude hut.

“And what would his Lordship say to my mistress, Mmm?” replied Geoffrey.

“I am commanded only to read the message to the tyrantess herself.” Giles responded sitting upright in his pallet and raising his head haughtily.

“Well, let me see, My Lord. I am her mistresses Factotum. If you wish to speak with her you will reveal the content of your message. If you do not wish to speak with her I may only suggest that you depart. You will find your weapon and armour in the Tribe’s armoury , the cave by the entrance. It will take you about ten minutes to walk it unencumbered by all that metal . A little longer given all the snow but with all the poor weather you will probably want to run because several members of the tribe haven’t eaten in a while.” He smiled a little unpleasantly. There was a long pause.

“I have sworn only to read the message to The Tyrantess herself. I cannot break an oath.” Relied Giles sadly.

“There, I am glad to say, I may assist.”  Said the goblin skipping quickly to his feet and  nimbly running to a pile of papers in the corner of the hut. “This, I presume, is the message of which you speak” he brandished the sealed letter “happily I am quite literate and able to read it for myself; thus you will have broken no oath. If having, read the letter I consider it appropriate, you may then, yourself, read it to Her Tyrantessness fulfill your duty with all honour intact? Mmm?” 

Giles considered the proposal. The goblin’s plan, he was reluctant to admit, seemed reasonable but surely sophisitic? On the other hand how much did he fancy his chances of running naked through 4 feet of snow avoiding a crowd of hungry, ten feet tall, quasi-human, man eating monsters, putting on his armour finding his horse and escaping without being eaten?

On balance the Goblin’s course of action had much to commend it he decided.

………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Hungry for more!

Well, things are happening in the campaign that have meant that I have had to accelerate the fluff a bit. I had planned that this would be 2 chapters but to keep place with developments I have had to do one rather longer chapter 3. Keep tuned in to find out what has driven Doreen to catatonia in....


Aunty Doreen’s Sewing Circle- The Truth and The Pain

CHAPTER THREE – DEATH IN THE DARK


“Estalia…Estalia”

Geoffrey mulled on the name as trudged through the snow towards his mistresses cave. At last he had the key to unlock The Tyrantess’ paralysis on Estalia: A cry for freedom and protection of the innocent, a plea for the dispossessed and unhomed. Surely nothing could be more guaranteed to inspire Her Tyranical Majesty to shake off her doubts and seize the opportunity for war than the protection of these downtrodden masses. For the first time in many long days Geoffrey was confident in predicting his mistresses reaction. Surely now she would silence the growing grumbles of discontent amongst her subjects. The Tribe chaffed for battle. The troops had heard of war and riches to be won, heads to be broken and much ale to be drunk. Some of the ‘guts and ‘eaters had begun to question why they were staying in the mountains while glory awaited in the south. A sullen brooding silence had settled on the camp. Fights had been breaking out between the young bulls. Geoffrey was worried by the whispering voices he heard around the campfires. Even now, as he made his way to Aunty Doreen’s cavern, he noticed the groups of ogres huddled together in doorways, small groups who stopped talking as he neared and watched him in silence as he passed. But now he had the answer.

The answer walked tall and proud behind him. Recovered from his frostbite Sir Giles de Ballinot made for an imposing sight dressed in his, now polished, armour and bearing in his hand the message that had been entrusted to him. The message that, Geoffrey hoped, would dictate the fate of many including The Tyrantess and her faithful servant.

Giles himself took stock of the tribe as he made his way through the tribe’s encampment. The sight of the filth made him shudder, the smells of spilt blood and warbeasts made him gag and the attire of the tribe themselves was bizarre in the extreme but their number and battle readiness was impressive. These ogres were massive and imposing. Their numbers were larger than he had ever dared to assume. If the rumours that had reached The Protectorate were true, that here was an ogre tribe that fought for peace and order, then truly these beasts could provide the heavy infantry support that their campaign so desperately needed. And if, in the name of protecting the innocent, they had, this once, to ally with such beasts- so be it. Perhaps.

………………………………………………………………………………………………..

“Your Tyrantessness”, warbled Geoffrey, bowing low, “May I present Sir Giles de Ballinot, Son of the Duc de Gorringe, Knight of the Realm of Bretonnia and Messenger of the esteemed leader of The Bretonnian Protectorate for Estalia Lord Baluin The Exile, come on a matter of great importance with an entreaty for Your Tyranical Majesty…”

Giles could hear the creature’s voice begin to falter. He peered through the rude, smokefilled room at the figure across the fire from him. He could make out the figure of a huge ogress dressed in a patchwork of faded pinks and yellows, fashioned into a garment that seemed a grotesque parody of the dress of a fine Bretonian lady. Even seated the creature towered above him, her slack jaw open, she stared into the fire with something like concentration, her breath rasping between her fat lips, stained red below her disturbingly filthy rouged cheeks. The cavern itself housed an odd assortment of items; a broken mirror, what appeared to be a looted painting of flowers in a vase, a woodcut print of kittens in a makeshift frame. All of this made Giles increasingly uncomfortable. Rumour suggested a certain eccentricity attached to this Tyrant but as Giles watched her catatonic expression he wondered whether madness might not have been closer to the truth.

“Your Tyranical Majesty,” he began, “word has reached my Lords of your fearsome yet principled reputation and so I am commanded to bear to..you…this message”.

The hulking creature had not moved. He looked at Geoffrey, his concern growing.

“Read her the letter” the Gnoblar nodded urgently.

Sir Giles unrolled the scroll and began;

“To the good Aunty Doreen

These are dark times. War looms over Estalia, and it seems that nothing can prevent it now. As the forces of darkness gather, the land cries out for salvation. I write to you now, begging that you take up this call. There are some who would stand up to this darkness. We fight now not for land, or wealth, or power. Those are the mistakes of the past, mistakes that laid the embers for the war that now threatens us all. Instead, we fight this war because it is the right thing to do. There will be no glory in this, no songs will be sung of our victories. We will die so that others may live. I ask everything of you, and offer in return only the righteousness of our cause….”



………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Doreen watched the flames dancing. She remembered other flames so long ago. So long ago in a lost past her mind had cut away. Even now it slammed the doors on those memories as she tried to draw them forth ripping her heart as she did with a pain unremembered yet fresh and raw. The flames of a feast fire. A betrothal feast. In the long dancing shadows of that fire a tyrant smiling at her benignly, taking her hand, calling her daughter. They walk the long hall to the bellows of the tribe and there in the woodsmoke he stands, his gut adorned with the blood, his body bruised and gashed from the contest of strength and skill. He had lifted the Rhinox for her. He would be her Bull. They would be lifebonded soon.

After Estalia…… After Estalia.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………..


“But she didn’t even move!” Shouted Giles in frustration.
“My mistress was simply musing on the import of Your Lordship’s message” oiled Geoffrey bowing and scraping before the angry manthing as he paced to and fro in the hut set aside for him.

“Musing! I can’t think she even heard me! She was catatonic! Oh, this is disaster, I must leave immediately to tell My Lord. We must find others to fight along side us. This is the very worst news.”

Geoffrey’s mind raced. Doreen had, indeed, not stirred one whit on hearing the message. She remained self absorbed and withdrawn throughout the man’s address and had made no attempt to reply. This was worse than Geoffrey had thought possible. If this knight went to other tribes and they learned that The Sewing Circle was weak their days were surely numbered. Not only that but it was taking all his efforts to keep the tribe’s own cohesion. Now here was this man shouting for all to hear. Given the rebellion fermenting in the Camp his bellowing could bring down revolution. With Doreen deposed what hope for him? No other Tyrant would appreciate his special talents, all they wanted was meat and ale not reading and writing. It would be back to the gnoblar pits for him and then what? No. It could not happen. It would not.

“My Lord, Her Tyrantessness is not herself this day. Speak with her on the morrow and all will be well. I promise that an audience in the morning will bring you the assurances you need. The sun is setting and the Mountains of Mourn are no place to be alone at night. Wait for Sunrise and if my Mistress’ humour is not improved, you loose nothing in the wait.”

“Very well, but I fear for your Mistress. Dark times come and her mind seems lost in a darker place still.” Sighed Giles, beginning to slip off his armour.

…………………………………………………………………………………………


Dark too it was as Geoffrey slipped from the shadow of one hut to the next. The moon was hidden behind the snow clouds and the only sounds to break the silence were the occasional snorts of the tribe or their beasts.

Cautiously, Geoffrey opened the skins at the entrance of Giles’ temporary hut and eased noiselessly inside. His sharp goblin eyes could see the form of the man under the sleeping hides, his eyes closed, breath heavy with the smell of the honeyed wine he had plied him with earlier in the evening. Geoffrey stealthily moved forward reaching inside his robe as he moved. With each slow step forward he withdrew the blade from its hidden sheath, its long wicked blade blackened against the risk of glinting and poisoned against the risk of awakening.

Finally he knelt by the head of Giles’ pallet, took a firm grip on the haft of the weapon and drove it two handed with all his might, up behind the knight’s chin forcing the razor sharp blade throught flesh and palette into the man’s brain before he could awake. For a second the Bretonnians eyes opened and Geoffrey slapped a hand over the dying man’s mouth, gripping the hilt of the dagger tight as it twisted, slick with the visitors blood in his hand.

Then it was over. All Geoffrey had to do now was drag the body to the Gorgers and they would dispose of the evidence of his treachery. Geoffrey stopped. No, not treachery. The Protectorate would have its ogres. The tribe would have its war. Giles was just another casuality of battle.

Before then one more task. Geoffrey wiped his hands and took parchment from the man’ s pack. A further search produced pen and ink. He began to write;

“Aunty Doreen (Tyrant)
The Really Big Cave
Near the Mammoth Carcass
Second Biggest Mountain
Mourn

Day after the big snow


To His Excellency Baluin the Exile


Your Excellency,

The Tyrantess Aunty Doreen of The Sewing Circle has considered your letter with interest and commanded me to reply on her behalf in large part owing to her abject inability to read or write. She has also now eaten the letter and, I regret to report, the messenger. For the latter she, and I, offer our apologies. I would wish to assure Your Excellency however that I have accurately transcribed the thoughts of my mistress below…..”


They would march to war. Geoffrey would make it so.




...

he does look like Shrek... LOL

Aunty Doreen’s Sewing Circle- The Truth and The Pain


CHAPTER FOUR - A revolt averted

“Es-Ta-Lia! Es-Ta-Lia!”

Geoffrey peered out of the cavemouth. He had never seen the tribe so restless. For them to gather in the centre of the camp and begin chanting in this manner was unprecedented, a clear sign that Aunty Doreen’s control was waning; never before would tribe members have dared to express their dissatisfaction so openly or so vocally. He peered back over his shoulder to the Tyrantess immobile, once again, near the fire pit, staring into the flames. He sighed. His life and hers were likely to depend on the performance he was about to give and given the angry sounds outside it would have to be the performance of his lifetime.

Pushing the hides covering the cavemouth aside and dazed for a moment by the weak,low winter sunlight, Geoffrey stepped into a wall of chanting voices, stamping feet and halitosis.

“Es-Ta-Lia! Es-Ta-Lia!”

Geoffrey bowed back towards the interior of the cave, shouting above the din;

“Yes your Tyrannical Majesty, I will inform your subjects Your Tyrantessness,” bowing again he began to scramble up the side of an untidy heap of looted boxes and barrels until he could be seen above the heads of the tribe. The chanting began to waver, its enthusiasm starting to drain away as Aunty Doreen’s Spoon Gnoblar assumed what he hoped would seem to be a stance expressing a nonchalant confidence which was as far from his true feelings as it was unjustified. As the noise subsided he began to unroll an impressive looking scroll impressed clearly with the bloody thumbprint of the Tyrantess that he had procured just minutes before from her unresisting hand.

“ I bring a proclamation from Her Tyrannical Majesty Aunty Doreen…”

There was a murmuring from the crowd, a nervous stirring of feet, a couple of guilty looking bulls even began to sidle away from the crowd before being pulled back into the mass by their fellow ogres.

“ Where is she?” came a bellow from the back of the crowd, followed by mutters of agreement

“Your Mistress is deeply absorbed in the creation of battle plans at this time and sends this proclamation.” Replied Geoffrey. A grumble of dissatisfaction followed. A mistake, he thought, to suggest planning and thoughtfulness in The Tyrantess was unlikely to engender support; “And polishing her mighty weapons for slaying” He quickly added, resulting in a somewhat more appreciative rumble from the crowd.

“Her Tyrantess has received a messenger with entreaties to war and I am…”

“Where is he?” Again the voice from the back of the crowd.

“What?”

“This messenger, where is he then.” Bellowed the heckler to more grumbles of agreement.

“Her Tyrannical Majesty received him formally..” more muttering from the crowd. Geoffrey raised his hand to no avail

“Her Tyrannical Majesty received him formally, listened to his message…” The sound of discontent grew but Geoffrey, consummate to the last was now comfortably into his stride;


“Her Tyrannical Majesty received him formally, listened to his message AND ATE HIM!” He shouted. A silence descended. It stretched …like a chasm….and then the cheer began, and grew and grew as Geoffrey pulled himself to his full size and shouted “We go to war! We go to Estalia! Es-Ta-Lia!”

“Es-Ta-Lia! Es-Ta-Lia!” The Tribe responded.


………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Inside her cave the chants of the tribe reverberated against the walls and inside the mind of a disturbed Tyrantess. The cracks were widening now. More and more of the past was flooding through. More and more she could recall of the Heifer who had been She Before Doreen. But still the fear, still the pain and the loss

“Estalia” she remembered him saying, “Its in South. A Long way. I can go and be a maneater. I will come back rich for you, THEN we can make the lifebond. You and I. Forever.” She recalled reaching up and touching his rough face, pressing her palm to his cheek feeling the wetness on her own as he collected his pack and began to march away. “I’ll send message gnoblars every day. I come back soon” He bellowed as he reached the end of the valley, raising his mighty greatsword in farewell.

She had stood there ‘till the sun had set and the chill of night had descended. He had gone, gone to Estalia. And she was afraid.

………………………………………………………………………………………………


At first the message gnoblars had come from him almost daily. They told of his journey. They talked of Tilea. Of all he had seen there. Of the sights and sounds. He shared with her the pain of that long march, the hunger that drove them to eat rocks and dirt, the exhaustion and finally the mighty bull charge that broke the siege at Fort Tobaro. Songs, he said, they had made of that. He had been feted and celebrated.

He joined the Estalian military she was told. Invited by none other than the mighty General de Silva of Bilbali . He was an ogre of substance no less. An ogre of some importance. Her heart had swollen with pride for him. Soon, she thought, he would be home, a mighty Maneater and they would be lifebonded.

His messages spoke of Estalia, its wide streets and high towers. He spoke of the dark beauty of its women folk, their love for all that was delicate and beautiful, their fine hair and slender limbs. The fine silks and robes they wore.

And then the messages began to slow. Weeks might pass. And she was afraid.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

The Tyrantess stared into the shimmering flames. Silent and still as if hewn from the rocks of the Mountains of Mourn but in her eyes the flames began to dance a little brighter.

This keeps getting better . Looking forward to more.

There is one more project for the tribe before new recruits arrive in the form of our new book but when preparing for that I realised that I had not posted the final section of Doreen's story so, with apologies for anyone who (as unlikely as it may seem) was actually reading it here goes;






CHAPTER FIVE- Awakening

“Estalia… Estalia” muttered Mavis as he peered at the crude map and back up at the intersecting valleys ahead, the sides shrouded in the last snowfalls of spring. He rubbed his balding head and inhaled deeply. The sharp smell of ice mixed with the musk of the tribe just half a mile to his rear. He looked back at the great column of lurching ogredom snaking down the mountainside behind him. Which way did Estalia lie? Beside him one of his sabretusks sat up, its bright eye fixed on a speck in the sky. A snow eagle, high above. Mavis watched it circle lazily overhead until, with a high screech it set off West.

“Well, lets call it a sign, hey old boy?” He whistled both of the great cats to their feet and turned to face the oncoming column.

“Western Valley!” He bellowed, pointing with his great spear, “I hope” he added in a whisper.


……………………………………………………………………………………………….


Geoffrey lurched inside the howdah and slammed his hand over his mouth. Not again. Surely he had nothing more in his stomach. Surely there was simply nothing more he could vomit.

He had always hated traveling by War-mammoth and this occasion was worse than ever. He was not sure whether it was the lurch and tilt of the great beast, the unspeakable smell of its coarse hide or the fear of discovery but he felt as ill now as he had ever felt in his life. Still, he reflected, this was, without doubt, a better method of travel than that being endured by most of his fellow gnoblars, driven forward under the shouts, cuffs and kicks of their ogre masters. Wretchedly, Geoffrey pulled himself to his feet and stumbled to the canvass door that divided the front of the great mounted tent from the Tyrantess’ inner sanctum. Pulling open the flaps he stepped into the murky twighlight beyond.

Doreen sat, still immobile, on her tyrant’s throne lashed to one of the uprights. Geoffrey had had to use all his guile to persuade two of the tribal maneaters that she was meditating on the battle to get them to carry her onto the mammoth in the middle of the night. By the time the tribe arrived in Estalia no-one would remember that they had “gone on ahead to make contact with our allies” as Geoffrey had put it, the morning after cutting up their poisoned corpses and dragging their remains to the gorgers. Two more casualties of war, he ruminated, just casualties of war.

He clambered up onto Doreen’s throne and waved a hand before her unresponsive eyes, peering into her slack-jawed, expressionless face, he shook his head. For a moment he thought he saw a flicker of something deep in her eyes- a brief candle flame of sentience but now, nothing but her dull black stare. Goffrey sighed. He needed to do something to drag the Tyrantess back to the here and now or their days were numbered and the tribe’s too. What was it that had dragged her mind away? She had always been fractured but those shards had been sharp and bright, like edges of a broken mirror, dangerous and brilliant. Now she just seemed broken. What had done this? What was there in Estalia that had driven her so far into herself, so far beyond reach? What was she so afraid of in Estalia?

Geoffrey clambered down and walked across the lurching floor to the exit. Fresh air. That’s what he needed. Fresh air and new thoughts. For the first time in his life he left the room without looking back or bowing.


……………………………………………………………………………………………..



   Yes, the messages had come every day to begin with. Her spirits rose each dawn as the message gnoblar arrived with some new tale of his journeys. How she loved to hear of his travels and adventures. How she suffered with him through his hardships. How she shared in his every joy, his every triumph. How she smiled at his thrill at the sights of Estallia; the high towers, colourful banners, pretty women.   How she missed him with every fibre of her being. How she had loved him.

How she had loved him.

Then the gnoblars had slowed. They spoke, when they came, with a more distant voice. Gone was the warmth and affection. Simply reports of his life. His service for the Estalian state. His duty to his new masters and his pride in that charge. His promotions, his decorations, his men. .. But nothing of her, nothing of them, nothing of their future.

…and then the betrayal. Both betrayed. His, the message gnoblar had said, by his superiors. Left to die on a mountainside, his comrades cut down, butchered by artillery, cut down where they stood waiting for the reinforcements that were promised but never came. Wounded and bereft he had retreated to the hills awaiting revenge. He had, he said , no time for love. Their promise was an old one. He had changed, she had remained behind. She would love another, he said. She would love another!

Under the weight her mind had shattered into a million bright crystals: Why had he gone, he whom she loved? Why had he broken the betrothal oath? Why was she unworthy of his love? She was not like the women of Estalia. She was not pretty and soft. She had no silks or trappings of womanhood. But she could change. She would embrace these things, she could be made afresh. Then he would love her.   He had risen; a leader. A general. She was beneath him. She must rise, become a leader! As tyrant he would love her. As a woman Tyrant all would love her and rejoice! She would be new! She would be his love again!


She had forgotten these things. She had forgotten the Time Before. Unable to bear the suffering she had forgotten this; the pain and the anguish that had formed her; the torment and flame that had burned her mind and forged her new spirit on the anvil of her own agony. He had made her Doreen. He had twisted her shape wrought her anew. He was the blacksmith, the creator. He was God to her Eve; creating her from the bones of his betrayal.


But now she remembered….she remembered it all…and she remembered his name.

………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Geoffrey sat outside the howdah, his back resting against the upright of the great canvass structure. The parchment on his lap was bathed in early spring sunshine as he wrote;

“Aunty Doreen (Tyrant)
The Really Big Cave
Near the Mammoth Carcass
Second Biggest Mountain
Mourn

Day after the day after the Mammoth hunt

Your Excellency

I am once again commanded to reply on behalf of my mistress the Tyrantess Aunty Doreen who thanks Your Excellency for his swift, courteous yet frank reply.

My mistress is concerned that Your Excellency is unable, at this time, to speak..”


The pen and parchment tumbled to the matting beneath him as he was wrenched into the air by the back of his robe. His feet twisted uselessly, desperately seeking purchase on thin air. Slowly he found himself being turned around to stare into the yellowing, blue shadowed eye of The Tyrantess Aunty Doreen.

“Gnoblar- Take me to Estalia. Take me to my love. Take me to Grugluk Skulltaka.”





……………………………

So there you have it. The story behind Doreen and her bizarre tenets.

Coming soon there is a new and, I believe, unique project on the way for which I must offer my thanks in advance to the management and staff of our local GW shop in Norwich who have made it possible. I hope this will kick off towards the end of the week so please do drop by.....

My hat is off to you candycake i think that you and your family have made one of the strangest groups of ogres ever to rival Gresus goldtooth.

and might i suggest, a some good models for interesting characters would be the games workshop bloodbowl ogres or the Mordheim Pit Fighter Ogre

lol the ears on shrek are just great very comical

Well, as 7th ed OKs are gently expiring in the dust Jambodini has finally got round to some more fluff'n'rules for The Sewing Circle. Here goes;

Aunty Doreen – 320pts

Little is known of the origins of the founder of the Sewing Circle, the eponymous Aunty Doreen, what little is known is shrouded in myth and legend. It is said that she single handedly defeated the Mighty Snag the Merciless and his bloody hoard of Boyz armed only with a bunch of gladioli and a broken chair leg. Others whisper that it was she who brought about the destruction of Groth Onefinger after he unadvisedly consumed her collection of prize chrysanthemums. What is certain, though, is that at some point in her long and distinguished life Aunty Doreen chanced upon a radical theory. It was simply this;

“People don’t like ogres. People like flowers and sunshine and little fluffy kittens. To make people like ogres we must be fluffier and nicer.”

This was apparently unassailable logic. Doreen therefore set about building a tribe of fluffy ogres dressed in happy smiley colours with cheery banners and smiley tattoos in place of the previous, frankly rather grim, ogre themes. The flaw, of course, in Doreen’s logic is that the thing that people don’t like about ogres is that they are violent genocidal maniacs who smell like the flatulent corpse of a three-week-dead Rhinox stuffed with limburger. Those things, sadly, she omitted to address. Over the years Doreen built up a large tribe of outcasts and misfits in the mountains, teaching them her new philosophy and spreading the message of cute. Incredibly, to the amazement of many of the other Ogre tyrants, her tribe swelled in size so much that she was able to carve out a small empire in the mountains!

However, her origins were still shrouded in mystery until about a decade after she first had her epiphany. Her messengers brought her news about a conflict brewing in far-away Estalia, and the tribe desperately wanted to sell their services over there to the noble cause of the crusading Bretonnians. However, Doreen remained impassive and unmoving on her fur throne for many weeks, for memories that she had hidden in her mind for years had begun to resurface.

Doreen had not always been cute. She had once been an ordinary, if slightly emotional and melodramatic, cow who had fallen in love with a dashing young Maneater who went by the name of Skulltaka. They had spent many years living, laughing and romancing together in the mountains before he ventured off to Estalia to earn some good dishonest money, promising to write to her every day. However, as his work grew harder and he was betrayed by his employer, the letters became less and less frequent until they finally stopped coming.

Doreen was crushed. She had spent every morning waiting outside of her hut, waiting for the letters to come, and now they had stopped completely. Tormented by what she thought was his betrayal, her mind fragmented under the stress as she sought to know what had apparently driven him away from her. She looked back over the letters he had sent, and realised that he had frequently mentioned the fair Estalian women he had met. So, seeking to emulate these women and win back her love, Doreen created a whole new persona for herself. She became a leader to match Skulltaka, the Poco General of Estalia, himself. Yet she also became soft and kind, attempting the grace of the Estalian women. Finally, she created her new philosophy to win back her love.

Doreen awoke from her near-catatonic state of cogitation to find her tribe in near-mutiny over her inactivity and her once-loyal spoon-gnoblar Geoffrey slowly and subtly assuming control. She quickly put the gnoblar back in his rightful place and spurred the tribe onewards again to Estalia, where she personally led an expedition to find Skulltaka and ‘discuss their break-up in a reasonable manner’. However, she never found him, especially since he was forced to retreat from his mountain stronghold and flee into the mountains again by a warband of Arabyans, but she did advance the noble cause of Bretonnia and spread the word of cuteness to the local populace. Her tribe’s looting and pillaging did nothing for her image, though.

And so Doreen continues to rule over the Sewing Circle to this very day. She continues to travel the world, crusading in the name of all things pure and fully and preaching her message of tolerance, understanding and cold-blooded murder to this very day. However, sometimes she leaves her tribal gatherings and goes out of her tent and stares into the sky for a while, dreaming of the time when she will finally be reunited with her partner and rule side by side together over her mighty tribe.

Name   M   WS   BS   S   T   W   I   A   Ld   Type
Aunty Doreen   6   6   4   5   5   5   4   5   9   Monstrous Inf.

Equipment: Hand weapon, heavy armour, Great Hammer of the Circle, Golden Gutplate.

Options: May take the Enchanted Table (+50pts), and may take Geoffrey the Spoon Gnoblar (+10pts).

Special Rules: Bull Charge,
•   Terror: Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. It’s even worse if Doreen is that woman, because when she gets angry she becomes one of the most terrifying and emotional women in the world…
Doreen causes Terror.
•   Tyrantess: Since her tribe’s rise to power, Doreen has become one of the most influential and powerful ogres in the mountains of mourn. Such is her new-found power and legendary resolve that she will kneel before no-one.
If she is taken in an army, Aunty Doreen must always be its General.

Magic Items:
•   Great Hammer of the Circle (magic weapon): This great two-handed hammer is Doreen’s staff of office. It is one of the most prominent symbols of the Sewing Circle, and all Ogres across the Mountains of Mourn have come to recognise, or admire (or fear) this hammer. It is usually used as nothing more than a ceremonial symbol of power – much like the sword and staff that are presented to various Old World monarchs at their coronations – the difference being that if anyone dares to threaten Doreen or her tribe she will not hesitate to use it to deal out some almighty thumps…
Great Weapon. In close combat, Doreen can choose to replace all of her attacks with a single Crush attack that is resolved against one enemy model in base contact with her or that is in a challenge with her. Roll to hit as usual. If the attack hits, the hit is resolved at Strength 10 and has the Multiple Wounds (D3+2) rule. Due to the fact that not even ever-growing flesh can stop the victim’s skull from being crushed in and his brains from being splattered everywhere, no Regeneration saves are allowed against a Crush attack.
•   Golden Gutplate (magic armour): The Golden Gutplate was made out of all the pretty jewellery that Doreen has ‘acquired’ from slain enemies over the years. It was melted down and reforged into a very pretty gutplate for her to wear. However, some of the jewellery that she melted down contained some very precious stones, and their properties now act on this gutplate and its wearer.
Confers a 6+ Armour Save which may be combined with other armour saves. Due to the effects of the precious stones, Doreen has a 5+ Ward Save and Magic Resistance (2).
•   The Enchanted Table (enchanted item): When Doreen captured Geoffrey whilst he was wandering through the mountains, she took his enchanted table as her own. It now carries her into battle as if it were a noble steed – albeit a  wooden, food-stained, cloth-covered one.
If Doreen has the Enchanted Table, her Movement is increased to 7 and she gains the Swiftstride rule.

Other Options:
•   Geoffrey the Spoon Gnoblar: Geoffrey’s tale is an extremely strange one. In his youth he worked for a famous butcher, but it was a boring, dead-end job. Like all gnoblars, he wanted excitement and loved low trickery, so he decided to pull a prank on his master. One day, when the butcher was away, he stole his master’s cooking spoon and began to wave it around, pretending that he was a wizard and writing weird sigils on all the furniture in tomato sauce. Unfortunately for him, he didn’t realise that the spoon really was magical, and his tomatoey runes accidentally brought a table to life! This table then proceeded to gallop randomly across the kitchen, destroying everything in its path! Fearing his master’s reaction, he ran away from the scene, spoon and table in tow, and fled across the mountains until Doreen found and ear-marked him. He now works in Doreen’s service, poking at her enemies in battle with his spoon!
Geoffrey counts as a Sword-Gnoblar, but due to his spoon all of his attacks count as magical. However, once per game, he may unleash the full power of his mighty spoon, and may exchange his usual attack for 3 magical attacks, resolved at Strength 4.

.....and there's more

Gloria Ironskin – 275pts

Gloria Ironskin was once the unhappily-married wife of famous tyrant Ghark Ironskin. She desperately wanted to accompany her husband on his raids, but he was adamant that she could not go. Thinking that his stubbornness was due to that fact that he was still depressed about his trusty rhinox, Bladehorn, and it untimely death, Gloria decided to give a huge amount of gold to the Chaos Dwarfs of Zharr to resurrect the creature. Unfortunately, whilst dragging the creature’s corpse all the way to the dark lands she got hungry, and by the end of the journey all the Deamonsmiths had to work with were a sorry pile of bones and fur. They therefore started from mostly-scratch and constructed a new brazen clockwork Bladehorn using those few bones and at least ten tonnes of metal!

Once Gloria had got Bladehorn back and paid the Chaos Dwarfs, she began to ride back to the Ironskin stronghold. However, on the way back she encountered a new fledgling tribe that had just settled in the mountains. This tribe was Aunty Doreen’s Sewing Circle, and though she was impressed by the tribe’s message and by its enthusiastic tyrantess, she still wanted to impress her husband and so rode on back home.

Unfortunately, Ghark was not impressed. He was still adamant that his wife could not go on the expeditions, but this time he became enraged by the fact that his beloved Bladehorn had been dug up, eaten and then turned into some sort of hissing, steaming cyborg thing by his meddling wife! Ghark and Gloria soon split apart and eventually divorced – Ghark continued to rule over his tribe, but Gloria wanted to advance the cause of ogre cows’ rights in the mountains and so joined the Sewing Circle. She was, however, persuaded by Doreen to rename Bladehorn, so she changed its name to the much more softer-sounding ‘Pooh’.

Gloria is now one of Doreen’s most trusted generals. She has witnessed the Sewing Circle’s rise to fame and power, and has smashed a fair few of its foes into the dust. Not only does she now advance the cause of cute through the mountains, but she rides to war herself atop her faithful Pooh, grinding her foes into the ground and bashing their brains out – whilst apologising for their premature deaths.

Name   M   WS   BS   S   T   W   I   A   Ld   Type
Gloria Ironskin   6   6   4   5   5   5   4   5   9   Monstrous Inf.
Pooh the Rhinox   7   4   0   6   5   5   2   4   5   Monstrous Beast

Equipment: Hand weapon, heavy armour, great weapon, Ironskin Icon, Horn of Grugglogg

Mount: Gloria may ride Pooh the Rhinox (+125pts)

Special Rules:
•   Gloria Ironskin: Bull Charge, Cause Fear
•   Pooh the Rhinox: Impact Hits (D3), Terror,
o   Iron Behemoth: Pooh is a huge, lumbering monstrosity whose armoured plates can turn away even the most determined of blows. Gloria will often take shelter behind his metal hide to protect herself.
Instead of adding the normal +1 to its rider’s armour save, Pooh adds +3.
o   Steam Blast: Pooh’s great engines and tubes sometimes vent some of its waste steam out into the open air. By pulling a few levers and giving its tubes a hard kick, Gloria can channel the flow of steam to unleash a torrent of burning smoke straight onto the enemy.
Pooh has a Breath Weapon. This is resolved at Strength 2 with a -3 Armour Save modifier. All wounds caused by it count as Flaming Attacks.

Magic Items:
•   Ironskin Icon (talisman): This icon is given to all tyrants of the Ironskin tribe when they force their way into power. This icon was once Ghark’s, but Gloria got it as part of the court procedings and divorce agreement. It seems to have some sort of innate magnetism that drives away flying iron and steel.
Gloria and her unit have a 5+ ward save against any attacks made in the shooting phase.
•   Horn of Grugglogg (enchanted item): This horn was crafted when the ogres were young by the great smith Grugglogg. It has been passed down from generation to generation of ogres until it was finally passed down to Ghark Ironskin and until it was stolen by Gloria whilst she was burning rude words into her husband’s tent with acid. When blown, the horn somehow drives all animals nearby into a frenzy, making them even more frightening than they usually are!
One use only. The horn may be blown at the beginning of any friendly or enemy close combat phase. Until the end of that phase, all friendly War Beasts, Monstrous Beasts, Monsters and all friendly mounts on the battlefield (including Cavalry mounts, Monstrous Cavalry mounts and Monstrous mounts) gain +1 Attack. In addition, all of the above creatures and their riders may subtract 1 from the result of any Break Test roll they make.





Grubby Harold – 195pts

(Note from Jambodini: I didn't actually get round to making any fluff for Harold due to a sudden onset of writer's block! Suffice to say that he is a gunpowder-addled firearms enthusiast who was forced out of his first tribe due to an unfortunate series of blackpowder-related issues and a small amount of crimefighting without former consent...)

Name   M   WS   BS   S   T   W   I   A   Ld   Type
Grubby Harold   6   5   4   5   5   4   3   4   8   Monstrous Inf.

Equipment: Hand weapon, heavy armour, brace of handguns, Lucky Bullets

Options: Harold may be upgraded to the army Battle Standard Bearer (+25pts). He may select one magic standard from the Warhammer rulebook or the Ogre Kingdoms army book as normal, or alternatively he may choose to carry the Grand Helf-Whacker Standard (+60pts).
(Note that he may use his brace of handguns even though he is holding the battle standard, and that his Lucky Bullets magic item will still work if he carries a magic standard.)

Special Rules: Bull Charge, Cause Fear,
•   Did he fire six shots…?: Harold is so obsessed with firing his handguns in the heat of battle that he even loses count of how many shots he fires!
Harold’s brace of handguns does not have the Multiple Shots (2) special rule. Instead, it has the Multiple Shots (D3+4) rule.

Magic Items:
•   Lucky Bullets (talisman): Over the years, Harold has nearly been killed by countless bullets that have failed to penetrate his thick blubber. He has kept these bullets on a chain around his neck after digging them out from his fat, and they do actually seem to be genuinely lucky. Whether it is through some strange magic or pure chance, they protect Harold from anything that would harm him.
Harold has a 5+ Ward Save.
•   Grand Helf-Whacker Standard (magic standard): The standard of the Sewing Circle tribe commemorates all the great victories that Aunty Doreen has achieved over her main foes – the High Elf exploration parties that have constantly encroached upon her land. This standard, once decorated with elegant Elven runes but now daubed with pink hearts and flowers, inspires the ogres fighting under it to glorious victory.
This banner adds +D3 combat resolution. In addition, the bearer causes Terror against all Elves (High, Dark and Wood!)

...and now for something completely different;

http://www.ogrestronghold.com/forum/index.php?topic=20253.new#new