11 Mar 2011
'The Tar Adder is one of the rarest, yet deadly predators in all of the known world. In Tar pits around The Mountains of Mourne and all over, left there from aeons past this lizard-like creature awaits you. You could go your whole life without noticing one, and still manage to die before you see it.
Its true colour is unknown, as the only recorded killing of the beast (and therefore the first time it could have been washed of the tarry coat.) was by the 'great' Ogre Chief Brian. He was meeting with (censored by order of his grace) to discuss (censored by order of his grace). The Ogre walked side by side to his mounted human counterpart, when the adder leapt from what was thought to be a pond (this sortie took place at dusk). The Imperial Representative managed to fire off a round from his pistol as the Ogre grabbed the blinded snake wrenching its head of with an unnatural pop. It then proceeded to stuff the body of the snake into its gaping maw, smashing the final part of the tail on his gutplate, upon which was a crude depiction of the Ogrish Deity.
(thought to be a tribe specific tradition, or a make shift solution to not having a 'Maw-Pit' in to which throw a portion of his meal). Still grasping the now dark red Snake's head he handed it to the Imperial Gentleman. Caught up in the adrenaline rush of a Near-Death experience he tore into the morsel and by some blessing of Sigmar kept it down!
Laughing heartily, the Ogre unclipped an animal trap, again, bearing some semblance to their God, and handed it to (censored by order of his grace) saying
'Here'y'arr, 'case you ever see one of the wrigglys!'
Not wanting to be outdone, a spear of Ogrish proportions was commissioned to be built, using the hardest tempered wood, and the best steel from the (censored by order of his grace) foundries. A deal was struck securing the Ogre and his tribe's aid in (censored by his grace) and their parting words before heading back to the mountains were:
'The fellas back up der'll love dis, ferra thinlin, you can bloody well eat!' This last remark was aimed at the Imperial Representative, who, at the Ogre's insistent encouragement had eaten so much a new suit of armour was currently being forged to fit his new figure.'
From the Imperial Archives, in the year (censored by order of his grace) in the reign of (censored by order of his grace).
Well, that's a little background, and when I'm less tired, I'll explain Brian's transformation from Tyrant of the recently renamed Tar Adders to their Slaughtermaster and Spiritual Guide.
Its true colour is unknown, as the only recorded killing of the beast (and therefore the first time it could have been washed of the tarry coat.) was by the 'great' Ogre Chief Brian. He was meeting with (censored by order of his grace) to discuss (censored by order of his grace). The Ogre walked side by side to his mounted human counterpart, when the adder leapt from what was thought to be a pond (this sortie took place at dusk). The Imperial Representative managed to fire off a round from his pistol as the Ogre grabbed the blinded snake wrenching its head of with an unnatural pop. It then proceeded to stuff the body of the snake into its gaping maw, smashing the final part of the tail on his gutplate, upon which was a crude depiction of the Ogrish Deity.
(thought to be a tribe specific tradition, or a make shift solution to not having a 'Maw-Pit' in to which throw a portion of his meal). Still grasping the now dark red Snake's head he handed it to the Imperial Gentleman. Caught up in the adrenaline rush of a Near-Death experience he tore into the morsel and by some blessing of Sigmar kept it down!
Laughing heartily, the Ogre unclipped an animal trap, again, bearing some semblance to their God, and handed it to (censored by order of his grace) saying
'Here'y'arr, 'case you ever see one of the wrigglys!'
Not wanting to be outdone, a spear of Ogrish proportions was commissioned to be built, using the hardest tempered wood, and the best steel from the (censored by order of his grace) foundries. A deal was struck securing the Ogre and his tribe's aid in (censored by his grace) and their parting words before heading back to the mountains were:
'The fellas back up der'll love dis, ferra thinlin, you can bloody well eat!' This last remark was aimed at the Imperial Representative, who, at the Ogre's insistent encouragement had eaten so much a new suit of armour was currently being forged to fit his new figure.'
From the Imperial Archives, in the year (censored by order of his grace) in the reign of (censored by order of his grace).
Well, that's a little background, and when I'm less tired, I'll explain Brian's transformation from Tyrant of the recently renamed Tar Adders to their Slaughtermaster and Spiritual Guide.
Overheard at my local Games Workshop:
"My Tyrant could eat your force and still have room for Dessert!"
"My Tyrant could eat your force and still have room for Dessert!"