14 Dec 2009
by GnolBolg Wolfeater
Wargen had never walked so much in his entire life, it had been a week since he had ran from Bifgut plains, but in the distance, he could still make out the top of Gut Tower. His legs were aching, and more importantly his stomach rumbling, and with a great gasp of breath, he fell forward into the dry dirt.
He hadn't lain there long before he felt something sharp stab into his leg. He hadn't the will, or the strength, to do anything about it. Again it came, prodding at his bulk, this time accompanied by the tell tale chattering of Gnoblars.
This ones bin wanderin' about for ages I reckon
Yeah, but there's still a lot of meat on im
When's he gonna die though?
Dunno, we could help im along though heh heh
Heh, yeah. Nippy, go an' grab us an axe or summat.
Wargen summoned up his last ounce of strength and hefted himself up on to his feet. The idea of being eaten by a scrabble of Gnoblars was far too embarrassing. Around his feet were six Gnoblars, each much taller than any he'd seen on the plains. They were all heavily scarred and wore scraggy furs, apparently taken from especially mangy animals.
Back off you little blighters, I'm not dead yet and won't be for a while.
Get back down you big oaf! the tallest of the Gnoblars cried, waving a long sharpened stick around, We's bloody ungry and you're a big fat Ogre ripe for the eatin'!
Well too bad, I've got stuff to be doing, stuff more important than being eaten by a load of scrawny Gnoblars
The head Gnoblar's eyes opened wide, and he waved his stick around even more furiously Scrawny! We ain't scrawny! Don't you know who I am?
Wargen took a long hard look at the fuming greenskin. He stood just under four feet, and was greyer in colour than most other Gnoblars. His body was riddled with claw marks, and was wrapped in a Sabretusk fur. Most notably though, this Gnoblar appeared to be lacking a skullcap, it had been replaced with a tin bowl, nailed straight onto his head.
No. he answered, puzzled Should I?
This was the last straw for the angered Gnoblar, and he leapt forward, rapidly pummelling Wargen's legs with his stick.
I am Tinhat the Trapper! You hear me? Tinhat!
In any other situation Wargen wouldn't have been bothered by Tinhat's assault, but after a weeks walking, his legs weren't in a very good state and he staggered back, wafting at the offending Gnoblar with his hands.
Get off will you! I've got important things to do. And my legs hurt!
What've you got to do that's more important than knowin' who I am? Tinhat shouted back, never faltering in his furious assault.
Urgup's sent me to go find the Maw, so I really should be going...
Urgup? Tinhat stepped back, leaning his weight on his long stick I used to know Urgup, way back. Why's he sendin' you then? You must be special or summat.
Yeah, maybe I am special; will you leave me alone now?
No I bloody won't! the Gnoblar waved a finger up at Wargen, suddenly looking a very wise. If Urgup's sent you to the Maw, then I'm comin' with you. Urgup knows fings you know, he can see fings we don't even know is appening, he can see fings that haven't even appened yet! And if he's sendin' you off to the Maw, then summat big must be about to appen, an' I wanna be part of it!
Why can't you just leave me alone? Wargen sighed, letting his hands go limp by his sides.
I can't cos I miss the adventure! I wanna get back to fighting humies and beasties like we did in the good old days, just me Sticktooth and Urgup. I've caught Rhinoxes bigger than any you've ever seen mate! And the fiercest Sabretusks too! And it's about time I got to catchin' stuff again! By now Tinhat was leaping about, excitedly acting out swordfights on the other Gnoblars who were trying to give him a wide berth.
If you promise not to hit me in the legs again you can come
It's a deal Tinhat cried, and jumped up to grab Wargen's index finger in his crooked hand, and give it as good a shake as he could. See, we've shook on it an' everyfin'.
After a short argument with his trapper's, Tinhat had settled it that Nippy was in charge in his stead, and that he might be gone for some time. He'd gathered some helpful tools and provisions from his cohort, and stuffed them into an old sac, which he slung over his hunched shoulder. He'd been walking alongside Wargen for about three hours, eagerly anticipating the adventure he was getting himself into, but one thing kept interrupting his train of thought, the loud, low grumbles that kept sounding from the depths of his Ogre companion's great gut.
You know what? he said, when he could take Wargen's rumbling stomach no longer, We's both pretty ungry chaps aren't we. An' that belly of yours ain't getting' any quieter. So why don't we start lookin' for some grub?
That's probably a pretty good idea Wargen said, gently holding his belly in his hands, he hadn't eaten since the night before he left the plains of Bifgut, and the stomach pains were now worse than ever before. How do you go about finding food in a dump like this though? I haven't seen anything worth eating in ages; even you're nothing but skin and bones.
There's plenty of food to be ad, snapped Tinhat, you've just gotta be cunnin' is all. You ever erded a Rhinox?
No. Why? Have you?
Yeah, it ain't all that ard really. Might be a bit much to call it erdin' though heh heh heh
Wargen couldn't get his head round the idea of one skinny Gnoblar herding Rhinoxen, he couldn't quite see how it would ever work out well for the little greenskin. Even he, almost three times Tinhat's height wouldn't usually go about trying such a risky feat - but this time he was very hungry indeed.
All right then, how do we do it? he said, hesitantly, the whole concept smacked of madness.
Oh you'll see, whispered Tinhat, and pulled a large horn out of his threadbare sack, pushed it to his thin, dry lips, and blew as hard as he could. The horn spat and sighed, before emitting a terrible roar, louder then anything anyone would expect from such a diminutive creature as a Gnoblar. Tinhat shove the horn back into the sack, and pricked up his ears, a look of utter concentration on his wrinkled face.
After about a minute of careful listening, a wide, sly smile split his lips, and he let out a cackling laugh.
Get ready! he shouted gleefully up at Wargen, and darted off over the next rise.
Before Wargen could think about what was happening, the ground began to rumble around him. He turned quickly to see a huge bull Rhinox charging headlong at him, its massive tusks flailing about frantically.
His head full of worry, Wargen rapidly weighed up his options: to see if his gut could take such an incredible blow, or to run like the wind. He chose the latter, and bounded out over the damp grass, the Rhinox's sharp tusks reaching dangerously close to his backside.
Just then, as he cleared a small hill, Tinhat popped up from behind some rocks and yelled at the top of his voice.
Jump you moron!
So he did.
Wargen had landed almost twenty feet on the other side of Tinhat's hiding place, and was face down in the gravely mud. Behind him Tinhat was leaping about excitedly, calling Wargen to look at the spectacle before him.
When Wargen made it back to Tinhat, he found the Rhinox slowly drowning in a pool of thick, wet, dark mud, its front end stuck deep beneath the ground.
It's sinkin' mud! cried Tinhat Told you I could get us some food!!
To Wargen's astonishment, Tinhat really was shaping up to be a handy companion.
Wargen had never walked so much in his entire life, it had been a week since he had ran from Bifgut plains, but in the distance, he could still make out the top of Gut Tower. His legs were aching, and more importantly his stomach rumbling, and with a great gasp of breath, he fell forward into the dry dirt.
He hadn't lain there long before he felt something sharp stab into his leg. He hadn't the will, or the strength, to do anything about it. Again it came, prodding at his bulk, this time accompanied by the tell tale chattering of Gnoblars.
This ones bin wanderin' about for ages I reckon
Yeah, but there's still a lot of meat on im
When's he gonna die though?
Dunno, we could help im along though heh heh
Heh, yeah. Nippy, go an' grab us an axe or summat.
Wargen summoned up his last ounce of strength and hefted himself up on to his feet. The idea of being eaten by a scrabble of Gnoblars was far too embarrassing. Around his feet were six Gnoblars, each much taller than any he'd seen on the plains. They were all heavily scarred and wore scraggy furs, apparently taken from especially mangy animals.
Back off you little blighters, I'm not dead yet and won't be for a while.
Get back down you big oaf! the tallest of the Gnoblars cried, waving a long sharpened stick around, We's bloody ungry and you're a big fat Ogre ripe for the eatin'!
Well too bad, I've got stuff to be doing, stuff more important than being eaten by a load of scrawny Gnoblars
The head Gnoblar's eyes opened wide, and he waved his stick around even more furiously Scrawny! We ain't scrawny! Don't you know who I am?
Wargen took a long hard look at the fuming greenskin. He stood just under four feet, and was greyer in colour than most other Gnoblars. His body was riddled with claw marks, and was wrapped in a Sabretusk fur. Most notably though, this Gnoblar appeared to be lacking a skullcap, it had been replaced with a tin bowl, nailed straight onto his head.
No. he answered, puzzled Should I?
This was the last straw for the angered Gnoblar, and he leapt forward, rapidly pummelling Wargen's legs with his stick.
I am Tinhat the Trapper! You hear me? Tinhat!
In any other situation Wargen wouldn't have been bothered by Tinhat's assault, but after a weeks walking, his legs weren't in a very good state and he staggered back, wafting at the offending Gnoblar with his hands.
Get off will you! I've got important things to do. And my legs hurt!
What've you got to do that's more important than knowin' who I am? Tinhat shouted back, never faltering in his furious assault.
Urgup's sent me to go find the Maw, so I really should be going...
Urgup? Tinhat stepped back, leaning his weight on his long stick I used to know Urgup, way back. Why's he sendin' you then? You must be special or summat.
Yeah, maybe I am special; will you leave me alone now?
No I bloody won't! the Gnoblar waved a finger up at Wargen, suddenly looking a very wise. If Urgup's sent you to the Maw, then I'm comin' with you. Urgup knows fings you know, he can see fings we don't even know is appening, he can see fings that haven't even appened yet! And if he's sendin' you off to the Maw, then summat big must be about to appen, an' I wanna be part of it!
Why can't you just leave me alone? Wargen sighed, letting his hands go limp by his sides.
I can't cos I miss the adventure! I wanna get back to fighting humies and beasties like we did in the good old days, just me Sticktooth and Urgup. I've caught Rhinoxes bigger than any you've ever seen mate! And the fiercest Sabretusks too! And it's about time I got to catchin' stuff again! By now Tinhat was leaping about, excitedly acting out swordfights on the other Gnoblars who were trying to give him a wide berth.
If you promise not to hit me in the legs again you can come
It's a deal Tinhat cried, and jumped up to grab Wargen's index finger in his crooked hand, and give it as good a shake as he could. See, we've shook on it an' everyfin'.
After a short argument with his trapper's, Tinhat had settled it that Nippy was in charge in his stead, and that he might be gone for some time. He'd gathered some helpful tools and provisions from his cohort, and stuffed them into an old sac, which he slung over his hunched shoulder. He'd been walking alongside Wargen for about three hours, eagerly anticipating the adventure he was getting himself into, but one thing kept interrupting his train of thought, the loud, low grumbles that kept sounding from the depths of his Ogre companion's great gut.
You know what? he said, when he could take Wargen's rumbling stomach no longer, We's both pretty ungry chaps aren't we. An' that belly of yours ain't getting' any quieter. So why don't we start lookin' for some grub?
That's probably a pretty good idea Wargen said, gently holding his belly in his hands, he hadn't eaten since the night before he left the plains of Bifgut, and the stomach pains were now worse than ever before. How do you go about finding food in a dump like this though? I haven't seen anything worth eating in ages; even you're nothing but skin and bones.
There's plenty of food to be ad, snapped Tinhat, you've just gotta be cunnin' is all. You ever erded a Rhinox?
No. Why? Have you?
Yeah, it ain't all that ard really. Might be a bit much to call it erdin' though heh heh heh
Wargen couldn't get his head round the idea of one skinny Gnoblar herding Rhinoxen, he couldn't quite see how it would ever work out well for the little greenskin. Even he, almost three times Tinhat's height wouldn't usually go about trying such a risky feat - but this time he was very hungry indeed.
All right then, how do we do it? he said, hesitantly, the whole concept smacked of madness.
Oh you'll see, whispered Tinhat, and pulled a large horn out of his threadbare sack, pushed it to his thin, dry lips, and blew as hard as he could. The horn spat and sighed, before emitting a terrible roar, louder then anything anyone would expect from such a diminutive creature as a Gnoblar. Tinhat shove the horn back into the sack, and pricked up his ears, a look of utter concentration on his wrinkled face.
After about a minute of careful listening, a wide, sly smile split his lips, and he let out a cackling laugh.
Get ready! he shouted gleefully up at Wargen, and darted off over the next rise.
Before Wargen could think about what was happening, the ground began to rumble around him. He turned quickly to see a huge bull Rhinox charging headlong at him, its massive tusks flailing about frantically.
His head full of worry, Wargen rapidly weighed up his options: to see if his gut could take such an incredible blow, or to run like the wind. He chose the latter, and bounded out over the damp grass, the Rhinox's sharp tusks reaching dangerously close to his backside.
Just then, as he cleared a small hill, Tinhat popped up from behind some rocks and yelled at the top of his voice.
Jump you moron!
So he did.
Wargen had landed almost twenty feet on the other side of Tinhat's hiding place, and was face down in the gravely mud. Behind him Tinhat was leaping about excitedly, calling Wargen to look at the spectacle before him.
When Wargen made it back to Tinhat, he found the Rhinox slowly drowning in a pool of thick, wet, dark mud, its front end stuck deep beneath the ground.
It's sinkin' mud! cried Tinhat Told you I could get us some food!!
To Wargen's astonishment, Tinhat really was shaping up to be a handy companion.